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She left

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She left.

I hurted her. Bad.

I so wanted to console her and tell her this was all a lie and this was not true at all. I felt a sudden urge to stop her but I just can't, I couldn't.

This is all because of Kiara. I can't let her die but on the other hand I can't let Preshtha go, but seems like I did let her go and when she was no more in the scene it did felt like she was no longer a part of my life. She was no longer with me, to give that cheeky smile. To help me in need, to talk to me about some stupid things.

But why do you care Rudra Rane? You never loved her. She was never yours and you never intended to make her as yours.

My mind mocked me.  It kept questioning me the question to which I didn't had the answers.

I just don't know what is happening with me. I held my head to stop these thoughts from coming. I needed Manas, I needed him. I want my bestfriend. I took my phone and dialled his number, he didn't picked up twice but I dialled his number again, he picked up the phone this time.

"What happened?" He said in a cold tone.

I chuckled looking at where fate has bought me. The friend who was always used try to talk to me, the friend who cracked jokes just to make me smile, the friend who used to hangout with me be it football club or bar clubs or disco, is fucking talking to me in a cold tone.

"She left" I said as my voice was almost going to get broke. I took the untouched drink which she bought and took few sips from it. It tasted good.

He knows what I have done. I have myself told him to tell Preshtha that I wanted to meet her & according to him I'm doing a big mistake. What could I have done either? I didn't had a choice. If I said no, someone's life was at stake.

"So? You never loved her right" this time my heart was urging him to tease me like how he used to tease me.

"I don't know" I said as I sipped more of the chocolate chip smoothie, whatever that is.

"Then know that you love her, & if this time if you are going to deny. Then I swear, you are not talking to me ever in this whole lifetime" Manas threatened me.

Do I really love her? This is the first time I asked this question to myself

You love Preshtha, and why won't you? Her eyes are plethora of euphoria in which she carries so much happiness, so much that she lights up her surrounding. She has been the one who was always patient with you and never pushed you to any extent, no one has ever did that to you. Indeed she is not the one but she is the infinity in which you are lost, & you will be lost forever.

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