Feral Mates

THIRTY-FIVE

Nyx's POV
Chapter 35

"No shitwarlocks," I stumble on a log, getting hurt on my bare feet but I proceed walking down the never ending path filled with nothing but trees alive and decaying ones. At this point my body has somehow become numb to new pain. I'm not quite sure if I should be worried or not.

Perhaps it's just nerves...

The moon is shining behind me as I force myself to walk, just walk until I get to the clearing or until I stumble upon the patrolling team for the night. Unfortunately due to my lack of power and will my senses are null so not only am I just stumbling on these little obstacles but I'm blind, slow and boy am I not feeling useless right this moment. My creatures are worn out and I really can't blame them because not only did I get the hell out of me beaten I was also unconscious most of the time in that wrenched pack. I'm yet to add one and one on that theory. Luckily for me I'm inside my pack lands so I focus on the short journey at hand. If anyone is to find me I'm most likely to get the proper help for someone in my state because goddess knows if I make it to my house I'm staying in there for a week wallowing in the confines of the only thing that still resembles normality in my life.

This trip, unlike many I've been on before has altered my life drastically to a point where I do not know where I begin or at which point my life is supposed to set course now that I've returned home. Regardless of the the amount of time I spent in the East I could feel somewhere within me that I was never going to return to normal. Hell, Kai refusing to speak with me is sign number one of my now altered reality. And as they say "it's the little things that end up making a huge difference." Now my life has lost meaning even more and the realisation that I'm no longer the woman that left the pack weakens me to the grounds, goddess. The turns that my life will soon take infuriate me with a big question facing me like on a big billboard "Now what?"

And what now?

It's baffling how quickly tables turn. No matter how much I'd like to say I did not feel what I felt in that pack for him, or even console myself by saying it was the aura or even their wicked hidden magic would all be a lie. I cannot avoid everything that I've felt and experienced in that little time with so much proximity.

His hair has the softest texture one could fathom, skin pale and glowing like, intoxicatingly so. I recall his arms around me the evening I was struggling to sleep, and how he read old folklore until I managed to close my eyes... Most importantly I remember how it was only his voice that actually lured me to sleep, I didn't care about the exact words he was uttering other than the feel of his hard palms on my back rubbing circles. Those memories are now forged in my head. When I say I won't be able to deny any of my primal feelings I mean that in fear. Because the absolute fear of the unknown with more power than earth holds frightens me. The thought of not being capable of rejecting this mateship due to the legendary tale of going berserk makes me so livid I'd rage in hurt and shame. The shame of hurting another while indulging myself in a mystery. I think most of us have heard the tale of one losing their sanity over a mere rejection, and from the stories only I think I am fine to prolong the rejection ceremony.

It's what will happen in between that scares me the most...

All these thoughts are hostage to my mind as I walk past the meadows which lead to my mother's coven. Trust aunt Tilia's memory of our pack to be that of her sisters residence. I suppose this is the right place to begin by announcing my return, as soon as I get back to the pack I will be swamped with work and mother is most likely to complain or "summon" herself.

And we don't want that now do we?

In the dark of the night I cannot help but wonder back to him, laying on the earth floor as he shuddered tremendously as if death was a step away, the sight alone made me feel very uneasy. So much that a part of me wanted to stay with him and tend to him. However I knew that if I had stayed I would not have stayed away from him from there on. I'm very wary about what could happen and if situation can be avoided then I will not to spend any more time in his presence.