𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑮𝒐𝒅 𝑯𝒂𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒓𝒂 | 𝙺𝙽𝚈 𝚡 𝙼𝚊𝚕𝚎!𝙾𝚌

Me + Xeno In Kimetsu No Yaiba

If SukunasThirdCock and I were in Kimetsu No Yaiba... what would happen???

This is based on what I think would happen and how I THINK Xeno would act, idk how he'd actually act tbh, he's too unpredictable... this was also written before I moved... 

---

"Oi, what the fuck...?" Ryder curses, looking up a giant wisteria tree that stood before him, "Isn't this wisteria?"

Xeno's eyes go wide, "Huh, Ryder?!"

Maybe the shock was because Ryder and Xeno lived across the world from each other, or the fact that they were dropped from the sky in front of a wisteria tree.

Ryder blinks momentarily before stalking over to Xeno, their tall figure standing above the British teen, "Ah, so you are prettier in person."

"And you're shorter in person, still hot though."

Ryder deadpanned, rolling his eyes and turning to look at the giant tree, "So, I am obviously not in London right now."

"And I, the U.S." Xeno replied, his eyes following Ryder's directory of the tree, "So the question is, where the hell are we?" He eyed the tree up and down, gazing down at the roots and then the soft bristling petals.

Ryder distanced himself from the tree, taking a few steps back, he was able to see the cliff space. The brit's interest was peaked, as Ryder trekked further into the unknown area. Xeno pursed his lips, mildly anxious of seeing his online friend in person. Xeno and Ryder talked a lot, every day, but now that they were face to face; Xeno felt uncharacteristically nervous.

"Well, this is bad." Ryder's voice cut through Xeno's thinking, "It seems like we are in Japan, and that isn't even the worst part." Ryder looked back at Xeno, crouched before the cliff space.

When Xeno stepped forward, he was prepared to see mountains of tall buildings and hear cars screeching across the busy streets, but he saw none of that. Instead, the two teenagers saw a village, the women wearing expensive looking kimonos and tall geta's and the men wearing traditional kimonos with soft bearings. 

Xeno's brow scrunched in confusion, as it often did, "What the hell? A festival or something?"

Ryder sighed, tilting his head as he kneeled down near the cliff side, "If I'm guessing correctly, this is the village Tanjiro fights the swamp demon in."

"Look, I know you're an anime geek but now is not the time to be making references." Xeno mentioned, slightly kicking Ryder with his converse, "What are we going to do?"

"My name is Kamado Tanjiro. I believe what you're saying, so don't worry!"

Ryder and Xeno's head snap to the side, recognizing the name almost immediately. When their eyes finally settled on the voice that shouted out, Xeno's eyes widened in surprise, while Ryder smirked in satisfaction.

"Told ya, love." Ryder mocked, the name rolling of his tongue without a second thought.

Xeno took a deep breath, "This is insane, super fucking cool, but insane. What are we supposed to do? I don't know about you but I've never trained a day in my life to fight a demon."

Ryder shrugged, "I used to play a lot of sports, give me a nichirin bat or something and I got this." He joked, the smile reassuring Xeno a bit, "I know this sounds crazy, love, but it's fine. Probably me just writing another shitty chapter and it'll be over before you know it, because I'm lazy as shit."

Xeno nods, "You right." The little bit of reassurance is all he needed before a flirty smirk took over his face, "You come here often?"

"If you're talking about Japan, then no. If you're talking about your dreams, well darling I'm in there all night." Ryder replied wittyly, winking at Xeno and grabbing the boy by his arm before anything else could be spoken.

"Let's go fuck up the plot, baby."

---

"Well, this is shittier than I thought it'd be." Ryder mumbled, walking through the small village, noticing that the demon had really turned the once lively village into a somber beast.

Xeno chuckled, his arm still wrapped around Ryder's as they walked through the village at night, not too concerned about the demon awaiting. Mostly because both of them were boys and the demon seemed to only be interested in young girls in the manga and anime, what a creep.

As they reared a corner, they saw exactly what they were expecting. Not necessarily exactly... Ryder and Xeno assumed they were in Demon Slayer, yet they had no idea they would be transported into Ryder's fanfic, The God Hashira.

Xeno practically had hearts in his eyes when he saw Miyake, his wandering eyes being momentarily halted when Ryder yanked him behind a tall and secluded fencing, "Hey-! It's my one chance to meet one of my anime husbands and you're ruining it!"

"If we're in the right chapter, then Miyake is going to go crazy any min-"

Tanjiro covered his mouth, gagging at the suffocating scent as Nezuko sweat nervously, both of them too scared and thrown off to do anything. Miyake grimaced, the letter crinkling underneath his hand as his boring grey eyes flamed into those of raging gold. 

Golden sand dunes of power and infuriation tumbled over as the oceans tidal waves flooded dangerously close to death.

"Mi-Miyake-Kun!!" Tanjiro rasped, his lungs dry and throat swelling up with how much bloodlust was infused with the air.

Before the demon could even blink, the rest of its world had fallen into the shambles of death. Miyake couldn't even congratulate Tanjiro on his success regarding his first ever mission. Miyake had zoned out and didn't even get to see the fight, the Hashira would be very depressed later realizing the fact.

But for now, Miyake's eyes bled into that damned letter, scorched with statements he had hoped to be false. Miyake averted his eyes up at Nezuko and Tanjiro, his whole body shaking in fury, but his golden eyes were littered with fear and worry.

"I... I have to get back to headquarters..."

Xeno shook, "D-Damn..." Then he smiled, "Who kn-knew he'd look lik-like such a daddy when an-g-ry." 

Ryder sighed and didn't have anything to say to that, knowing what he envisioned during this scene was exactly his own doing. It seemed that whatever Ryder thought of in the moment he was writing a scene was how it played out.

So the scornful look in Miyake's eyes was truthfully very vibrant, the gold irises and yellow glow really did look burning hot and everything including the air around them felt hot and humid. Xeno was probably more turned on than scared in that moment, to be honest.

Ryder didn't feel much of anything from Miyake and wondered if it was because he was technically his creator. Then, he got side tracked, zoned out, and started thinking if he counted as Miyake's 'god' by standards or if he would get to meet the gods.

Xeno shoved Ryder, "Dude, Tanjiro and Nezuko are leaving. In a rush, might I add."

"I wonder if we can die here." Ryder bluntly mentioned, the dead look in his eyes still prominent as the world around him seemed fuzzy and unfocused. 

Xeno seemed down for anything, "Wanna test it out?"

They tested it out and then they were sent back home, seems like the only way to be sent back to their universe was to die. Ryder jumped off a cliff and died, Xeno actually died before Ryder did by poisoning. Xeno ate a random mushroom on the forest floor and was slowly poisoned until they died at the same time.

They were very disappointed and perplexed when they both woke up in their own room, wide awake and heavily pissed off from the fact that they didn't even get to meet their favorite characters.