Before She Even Knows

Chapter 40 - Maybe I've always been

Hey lovely readers, this chapter will be bit of back and forth between Emma and Noah's POV's, but trust me, it will be worth it!!

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NOAH's POV

I'm trying not to show how excited I actually feel, because she'd probably think it's stupid, but the truth is, I am very excited with the fact that Emma is here.

I get to spend the next 72 hours by her side, not a minute less and this feels better than I want to admit.

The one thing that I'm not very happy about with is the way Madeleine has been looking at me since we arrived at the lake house, a couple of hours ago.

As soon as we sorted everything - correction, as soon as my best friend sorted everything - and we were all settled, she cornered me alone in the kitchen and asked me the one question I knew she would eventually ask.

"So, are you?"

"Am I what?" I ask annoyed. Don't ask me how, but somehow I already knew what she wanted to know and the honest answer is I don't know.

"Are you in love in her?" I sigh heavily.

Am I?

"Why don't you go bother someone else? I'm busy."

"I don't know why you keep shutting me out when it comes to Emma. You always told me everything about your life Noah, but now you barely talk to me about it. I know you and I definitely know that you wouldn't be treating her like that if you didn't like her for real, so go on, don't say it, but I still know the truth."

I look at her, not knowing what to say.

She's right. I've been avoiding talking about Emma, all because of that stupid plan. I can't tell her that I started dating Emma because I wanted to get information from her. That was the reason, right?

Until a week ago I would have believed that's true and trust me, I repeated that over and over inside my head, but I know that's not the only reason I want her to be my girlfriend.

So, for the first time when she mentions Emma, I'm not annoyed. I'm confused.

She turns around to go to the living room where the rest of our friends are making plans for the night, but before she disappears, she looks at me with a smirk on her face.

"Just so you know, she loves you too."

As soon as the words left her mouth, I froze in place. She loves me? Emma loves me?

Just the thought that this might be possible lights feelings in me that I can't quite describe. I've never felt this way for anyone in my entire life and this scares me.

I was doing just fine with this whole 'pretend' to date thing, until everything that came next and I started wanting more.

Fuck, who am I kidding? The real reason why she's my girlfriend is because I really want her to be. I was just too blind to see it before.

Our date, her gorgeous smile, just being by her side, my absolute fear that her father would tell her about me, and the sex. If I say that sleeping with her was the best sex of my life, it would be an understatement.

I won't tell you the details, but damn, it was fucking amazing.

I have a feeling that she'll be my every best. The best laugh, best kiss, best sex, but love?

My first love? No, I'm not in love with her. How could I be when I feel such a dick for sleeping with her after what she told me about her dad?

I shouldn't have let it go that far, but when she looked at me like I was the only person that matters in the world, there was no turning back.