We Were Blue // Completed

44//

"Bran thought about it. 'Can a man still be brave if he's afraid?' 'That is the only time a man can be brave,' his father told him."

- George R.R. Martin

* * *

The gravel crunches under my footfalls, it sounds deafening compared to the quiet night, or perhaps it's my fear making my senses reach heightened levels. I trail my eyes up to look at Roman, specifically where he shoved the gun into his pants, hidden beneath his shirt and black jacket. It seemed so natural, like he had done it a million times before, but then again maybe he has.

Like a fire iron on my skin the knife in my pocket sets my leg ablaze, burning slow deliberate holes through my body. Roman tried to give me a gun earlier, claiming it was for my protection. My denial of the gift didn't leave him too happy but I rather be the one in pain than be responsible for putting a bullet through another human.

I run my gaze over Roman's form, his steps are fierce and determined as we round the abandoned building to where Julian claimed a side entrance would be. I gulp as my eyes spot the blood red door, the paint peels away like someone took their finger nails and ran them down the length of the wood, scratching and clawing until the oak beneath was visible. 

The need to latch onto Roman's hand and feel his warmth buzzes through my body but I refuse to give into the desire. Not only would it give the illusion of me being weak but also confirm what Damon probably already suspects about the two of us. Debris is scattered on the ground and bugs have made a residence hidden within the cracks of the old building, crawling in and out as they search for food. 

A shudder runs down my spine as I glance up at the fifteen story structure, briefly wondering what it was once used for. I run my sweaty palms down the front of my black jeans as we approach the door, praying to God that this goes better than my gut tells me it will. 

Roman comes to halt in front of the door, his eyebrows pulling together as he glances back at me. "Ready?" My heart's in my throat as I reluctantly nod my head. Hovering behind him, I allow him to act as my protector, like maybe he can save me from whatever lies behind this door. Roman knocks on the wood, the sound echoes in my ears, sounding louder than it probably is.

One. 

Two. 

Three.

I count the second in my head, tittering on my feet as I try to convince myself not to turn around and run as fast as I can in the opposite direction. Damon's in there. I remind myself, pulling down on the sleeves of my black jacket as a gusty breeze sweeps in and whispers against my skin. 

Four.

Five.

Six.

I think about how I got here, about the day the Caldwell twins forced their way back into my life. If only I had known what I was getting myself into. Would I change it? Would I turn back time and keep myself away from the boys I've come to love? No, I decide. I would do it all over again, even if it only ends in my ultimate destruction.

Seven.

Eight.

Nine.

My heart pounds with every approaching step on the other side of the door. Focusing my attention on the naked trees in the distance, I watch as they sway and dance to a melody I can't hear. They wave their branches and appear almost ghostly against the midnight blue sky. I breathe in slowly, bringing oxygen to my needy lungs as the steps become closer.