We Were Blue // Completed

0//

I'm too late.

It's my only thought as I stand before the floor to ceiling windows, gazing at one particular airplane about to take flight. Gripping onto the gold chain of my purse, I watch as the plane peels off the ground taking with it my blistering heart. My eyes burn as I bend down to remove my strappy high heels from my feet, ignoring the pity glances being sent my way as I make my way back to the front entrance.

If only I had known thirty minutes earlier, maybe then I could have talked him out of leaving, maybe then he wouldn't be on his way to Spain. Somehow I manage to keep myself from falling apart until I'm back in the safety of my car. My silky red dress shimmies up my thigh as I hold my head in my hands and allow the tears to finally fall. A hiccuped sob escapes me as I put the car into reverse.

No goodbye. No warning. No nothing, and then he was gone, and on the anniversary of the day we met all those years ago. The thought only makes me cry harder, causing stop lights to blur into blobs of color and signs to become illegible.

He's gone.

Rain pelts my windshield making the outside world even harder to see and I wonder if heaven is feeling the same way as I do; it sure appears that way. With moistened eyes and a shattered heart, I pull off onto the side of the highway. My caution lights reflect off the wet pavement as I get out of my car. The rain pelts my body- sharp and wicked- like razor blades on my skin but it's the only thing capable of washing away my tears. Mama won't be too kind if she catches sight of them after all.

Headlights shine down the dark road reminding me that I should be going and propelling me back inside the warmth of my dry car. Pushing soaked strands of hair behind my ear, I inhale thickly and start back down the road, this time swallowing back the pain when it tries to drown me. I try to forget his smile and laugh and everything that made me fall in love with him in the first place.