One Lifetime Is Never Enough

"What This Princess Wants... "

You see, I am not the type to mull over what has passed.

I am always the planner, always a thinker. Whatever I decide to do, is a product of a long mulling inside my own brain. 

Therefore, my every course of action will never be a reason for me to regret later on. 

Although there were some moments where I have undoubtedly think of a different outcome, should I have taken a different decision, I always quickly pick myself up, and move on.

Time does not stop. Time will not rewind just because of my unnecessary thought of 'what if's.

Perhaps, that is how I am seemingly always quick to adapt. 

I don't.

I just don't show it - my uneasiness, my doubts. But still, I observe, I learn, I decide.

And I never regret.

When I decide on something, I will go through it until the very end.

I have been fortunate. 

Ever since I became Bai YuLan, the people around me have been blessings from the heavens - if there was one. These people make me believe, heavens have truly been kind to me.

Then I forgot that although there are truly kind people, there are truly...

-truly, truly, truly hateful people as well.

I understand, I want to understand her point of view. Especially in this time and age - heck, I don't even know what time or era this is. This is certainly not ancient China that I have learnt about in my past life, although it can very well be one.

But none of that really matters.

What matters is... this...this... insufferable little brat!!!

You may be a Royal Princess, but is that how you talk to people?

Nevertheless, quite honestly, I have to applaud her courage, and her denial. She has zeal, that one.

What did she say?

["The General has been befuddled, charmed by your beguilement, taking advantage of the adolescence's state of mind."]

Ayayay~, you tacos-for-brain, when did I ever beguile your General huh?

Wait, scrap that, - not your General.

Ji SongLi is definitely NOT your General!

["Miss Bai should know your own place."]  

Oh? But I do! There has never been a time where I am most clear on where I should be, where I want to be.

I know my place. I know the place where I want to be.

I have already been feeling like shit because I did not get to talk to SongLi before he left, again.

Yes, it was my fault. Before I left Hun'ang, I did not clearly tell him that I wished to speak to him.

I... somehow, have always been taking his presence for granted; I forgot, that he of course, does not know yet what I feel about him. Therefore, he couldn't have waited for me that day, as I have not yet told him properly to wait for me.

However, thankfully, JingXiang, and looking after Xiao Hui as well, have been a good distraction.

I thought I can just wait for him to come back again. Of course he will, I know it. It is just a matter of time. Then I will tell him properly, and he can decide on what he wants to do. What we should do together.

But, hey, there came Madamoiselle Bitch - do pardon my French - spluttering nonsense left and right that I was, quite honestly, so dumbfounded I could not find a way to retort on the spot.

This insufferable Princess is so high up her ass that no amount of Buddha's chanting can calm my soul.

Calm down, YuLan, the state is the mind, the state is the mind, let the light soothe your soul... Amitabha... .

Argh, who am I kidding! I am certainly not a vegetarian. In all kinds of sense.

Mia Simmons did not climb the treacherous ladder of the corporate world by being a herbivore either.

But hey, Princess Baka, I actually agree on that thing you have said.

What was it?

[ "Only a Princess can be a suitable partner for General Ji, bringing his prestige and his future to greater heights."]  

["What this Princess wants, she will get"]

Ah, that's it. 

Exactly, sunshine.

JingHan, I will take your word for it. I will claim by birthright - as you have mentioned so frequently. 

A Princess, is that it?

I don't care much for status. But that brat has a point. 

I will do it for Ji SongLi.

What this Princess wants, I will get!

And I very well know what - who - I want.

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