YOONMIN : Beautiful encounter

Part 18

Jimin: The date II.

It was a month later, still hot as ever, but what did I really expect since it was mid-August. The sweat was slowly dripping down my forehead and the sides of my face, under the large washed-out Metallica T-shirt I was wearing. It was sticking to the itchy skin of my collarbone and chest. It was strangely comfortable that night on the roof of a deserted RV by the seaside, a beer in one hand, the other one hanging lifelessly by Jonghyun's knee. We weren't touching, it was way too hot for that, but our bodies were sprawled out just at the right angle to feel the other's heat and see each other's chests rising rapidly. Jonghyun was sweaty and smelly and quiet that night, but oddly still beautiful, the way his hand slowly reached for me sometimes and combed through my wet hair, pushing it out of my eyes.

This wasn't really my thing - spending the night outside, sleeping on some trashy vehicle, being woken up at 2 AM just to listen to the soft sound of waves, mixed with my lover's heavy breaths, but I've grown fond of it. I was more of a sweet-morning-dates-kissing-in-the-park type of person and even though Jonghyun knew that he insisted on pulling me out of my comfort zone. I let him, because ... well ... there was just something appealing about him being all happy, sleepy and mine.

I yawned, covering my mouth a second too late, because of how lazy I was feeling, and Jonghyun murmured a quiet 'cute', before closing his eyes again, a warm smile on his lips. He made me feel all fuzzy inside.

"Are you sleepy?" he asked, his voice groggy, almost as if he was high.

"Who wouldn't be? You woke me up yet again?"

"I'm sorry."

"Don't worry, I like it."

His long fingers made an unpleasant sound when grasping the cold neck of his beer bottle.

"Do you really?" he asked lazily.

"No."

He just hummed and went quiet again.

We were like that - honest, silent and casual, nothing like the impatient people we should be, based on the fact we got together basically two days after we've met. He was quite embarrassed when he asked me back then, saying he should probably wait a few months due to the fact I might not feel comfortable yet, but I said yes anyway.

Why? I don't know.

How? I honestly can't recall.

The only thing I could remember was his big smile that melted my insides. There was just something in the air when we were together and I don't mean love, that's cheesy as heck.

I had a feeling I was running out of time and if I didn't embrace him immediately, I might not get the chance to. I don't know what made me feel that way, maybe his melancholic soul or the hurt in his eyes ... or maybe the truth he never told me.

It was absolutely beautiful - that on some days I could see galaxies in his eyes, stars so bright it blinded me, but on others, there were clouds, so black and thick they took all the remaining space that was usually filled with love that I told myself was for me. But it was also absolutely terrifying - how I never knew what he was questioning himself.

About his decisions or ...

... or me

... or his existence.

My eyes followed his movements as he lifted his beer bottle to his lips, gulping it down almost completely, his Adam's apple bobbing in the process. He combed his hair back, exposing the pale skin of his neck, before he leaned back down, his elbow bumping against mine.