YOONMIN : Beautiful encounter

Part 28

Hoseok: The girl

"Jungkook could you-"

"I'm sorry, hyung, Tae and Jimin are still in the dressing room and I've got to find them."

"O-oh. Don't worry, I'll just ask Namjoon-"

"I can't either. Jin needs me to start this up."

I gave him a small disappointed nod. It's not that it was a big deal - I was just really thirsty and the water was on their side of the table. The thing that really bothered me was that they were like that all the time.

This Yoonmin, Namjin and Taekook thing was getting to me because ... well, because they all ended up together, looked after each other, completely forgetting I existed.

I wasn't petty, not at all, I ... was just ... lonely.

I wished someone would notice me, appreciate me.

They were my friends, and there for me when I needed them, of course, but there were just situations in which I wished to have that special someone.

I was sick and tired of this cameraman taking care of me while I was drunk when Jin helped Namjoon, Jungkook took Tae to sleep and Yoongi pretended to not care about Jimin.

Like, I was there too!

I had a feeling like I was back on square one, wanting my hyungs to hang out with me and accept the little things about me.

My favorite color was yellow.

I always poured the milk before adding cereal.

I loved sprite and sunrises and colorful skies.

My laugh was crooked and wide and damn bright.

But did anyone notice any of that? Of course not.

They all loved me, but none of them was in love with me, therefore it was not really my place to be noticed.

At first, I was happy for them, you know. They were all happy now, once insecure jocks did not only love themselves but someone else too, even if they'd never admit it.

It was my job after all- to be bright, smile even when I was sad, to make them happy.

However, I couldn't help my selfishness that burned like fire, eating my soul inside out until I was constantly wondering...

Will I ever be loved?

Do I deserve it?

Is it bad to wish for it?

Can't I just be happy for them?

Jin cut my thoughts as he put a glass of water in front of me and smiled.

"It's about to start," he whispered even though I could already hear the excited squealing of our adorable fans.

We chose to have a quick fan meeting before our tour, simply to charge with energy and inspiration that they always gave us, expecting nothing in return.

We were seated by a long table, I was the first one, next to Yoongi-hyung who was slowly dozing off. Each fan had a quick chance to talk to us, ask for autographs and even bring us gifts that we were always grateful for. One of them even showed me a fanfiction that she's written about me, telling me I was her grandma's ultimate bias, whatever that meant, but it made me feel good.

It made me feel loved.

Minutes passed by, making me forget all about my problems and fears.

"Hobi-ah!"