Forever Rain || BTS

Chapter 18

"(Y/n)? You still with me?"

You blinked and looked up at the man in front of you. He was young looking with silver hair and kind eyes. He was smiling softly at you, showing off his dimples.

You felt a lump in your throat as you recognised his face so clearly.

Its not him.

Its not Namjoon.

You had to keep reminding yourself that Doctor Kim wasn't your best friend. That the Namjoon you knew was dead.

Your last nightmare had felt too real. It seemed like it lasted years and all the emotions and events felt so raw that even two days later, you were having trouble separating them from your real life.

You were finally understanding what the mysterious male in your dream meant when he said you didn't want to find out the truth. Even now, you found yourself wanting to go back. Back to the relationships you had, back to your home and back to your life.

Instead, you were stuck in the real world.

Feeling miserable.

"I'm here Doctor Kim," you replied softly.

"Please, call me Namjoon," the Doctor suggested.

You shook your head.

Then I'll just keep thinking you're him.

Doctor Kim sighed and looked down at his notes. "It's been a while since our last session. Almost a month. Have the nightmares gotten better? Doctor Kim says you had some trouble the other night."

The corner of your mouth tugged upward slightly at Doctor Kim talking about Doctor Kim. It sounded like he was talking about himself, but there were in fact two of them.

In my dream at least I knew them by their first names.

I wonder if Taehyung is a Doctor as well.

If he's even real.

Since waking up from the nightmare, you had remembered a couple people from your real life who had appeared in the dream. Your parents were the same, Jimin was still your neighbour but at the hospital instead of your house, Namjoon was your psychiatrist Doctor Kim, and Jin was a worker at the hospital who made sure you were comfortable and was usually the one who found you when you were having a nightmare. Also named Doctor Kim.

Hoseok, Jungkook, Taehyung and Suga were still unknown to you. You had faint memories of seeing them sometime but you weren't sure anymore if it was real or if you were just getting confused between the dream and reality. There were too many things that happened in both. Like the nightmares for example.

If I'm gonna have a dream that feels real, couldn't I have at least left out the nightmares thing?

Just like in your dream, you had been struggling with nightmares for most of your life. It was the reason you were stuck all alone in the cold, white room. Your parents felt too burdened to look after you anymore and sent you here instead, making you someone else's problem.

Doctor Kim's smile grew more awkward and you realised he was waiting for an answer.

"Oh. Um... I don't think so," you murmured.

"You don't think the nightmares have gotten better?" Namjoon - no, Doctor Kim - prodded.

You shook your head softly.

"Can you tell me about the last one? Doctor Kim said it shook you up quite a bit," the silver haired said gently.

You winced inwardly at the memory of waking up from the nightmare. You had freaked out a bit, not being able to sort the dream from reality and tried to hug the blonde Doctor Kim, still thinking he was your brother.