UNEXPECTED • Jake Kiszka

Chapter 13 - AVOIDANT

TW: Panic attack.

I wake up to Jake's spot in the bed empty. I get up to check the time that reads 8:28am. I get changed and go downstairs. I walk into the living room to see Jake, Josh and Danny. I walk towards Jake and sit next to him. He moves away a little. I stay there and think, 'Maybe he just wants a little space. I was sitting a little close to him.'

I look at him and he doesn't look back. I sit there, on my phone and scrolling through instagram. Jake gets up and I look at him. He doesn't look at me. Not a word said to each other.

He comes back sitting on the other side of the couch. I sigh leaning back on the back of the couch. I shove my phone in my face and continue to scroll through instagram.

After a while, I get up and go outside and stare at the trees. I hear the door open. I look over to see Danny.

"Hey. You alright?" He asks.

I don't give a response and he sits next to me.

"Jenna. Are you okay?" He asks again. I feel a sharp pain in my eyes as some tears fall. "Jenna oh my god. I will be right back." He says, running inside. I look in the window to see him trying to get Jake but Jake won't move. I start to cry even more. Had I done something wrong to  him? Why was he being so avoidant? Josh comes out and sees me crying. He rushes over to me, embracing me in a hug. I hug back and cry on his shoulder.

Danny looks out the window and I look at him with saddened eyes. His facial expressions change once everything clicks. He turns back to Jake with a stern look on his face and takes him into a separate room.

"What's wrong Jenna?"

"Jake is being so avoidant lately. Yes I get the Sam situation but why this morning? What did I do? We were happy last night and now he doesn't even look at me. I feel like I messed up like I always do." I sob even harder, the hardest I have ever sobbed in my entire life.

"You did nothing. Sam lied about that night. He kissed you and took you to advantage and kissed you. He took you home because you had thrown up and he slept with you. Not that kind of slept with you but you had fallen asleep as soon as you got in his car and he carried you to your room and he fell asleep with you that night. He woke up before you and went to his room and realized what he had done and went to his room." I pull away and look him in the eyes.

"Why would he do that? I mean I know I was drunk, I know he likes me but why? He barely even drank from what I remember from that night."

"He wasn't that drunk and it's because he likes you. He knows the consequences but he is tryingto fight and trying to win over you." I laugh a little but still sobbing. He looks confused.

"Sorry. It's just, I have never had anyone fight over me before and this whole thing is ridiculous and the fact that I have to be a part of it. Not just a part of it, I have to be the main problem and it makes me feel so selfish and a traitor and and and." I broke down again.

I start to have a panic attack. I stand up from the chair and Josh's arm and walk over to the wall. I slid down and tried to breathe. I am unable to breathe and my hands are very shaky and I close my eyes. I try to focus on the fresh wind but it doesn't help. This panic attack is probably the worst one I have ever had. What other terrible things are in God's hand today? I lean my head on the wall behind me.

"I will be back." He runs inside. And I know that he is going to try to get Jake. Josh comes back out without Jake and rushes over with his questions page that I had given him for when I have panic attacks. Jake is now in the window by the door and he is staring at me. He walks out and straight to me. Jake takes my hands and tells me to close my eyes again.

"1 thing you smell?" Josh asks.

"Jakes cologne." I reply after a couple of sniffs for a scent.

"2 things you hear?" Josh continues. I listen for about a minute and reply after,

"The birds chirping and, and, and the trees moving from the wind." I stutter,

"3 things you see?" Josh asks again and Jake is still holding my hands. I open my eyes to see his sincere eyes staring at me.

"Jake, the pool and the forest."

I have calmed down by now, my hands still shaking but I am able to breathe. I had noticed I stopped hyperventilating and stopped crying. Jake takes his hands away from mine, wiping my tears and helping me up. I hug Josh and say my thanks.

"I need to talk to you." Jake says, pulling me inside and to his room.

"So? What do you need to talk about?"

"This may be bad timing but Sam had lied about the other night and he to-"

"Josh already told me. But what does this have to do with you being so avoidant? Did I do anything wrong?" I ask. He only stares at me. No response came to his mind. I scoff and go to leave. He grabs my hand and pulls me to face him again. "Jake let go of me." I say being more stern and almost yelling. He pulls me into him and kisses me. I am upset and shocked but kiss back, melting into the kiss. I pull away and go downstairs without a single word said after.

Jake, running after me. My hand over my mouth. Trying not to throw up. I ran to the downstairs washroom because Ronnie was using the one upstairs. I run inside and throw up in the toilet. Jake holds my hair behind my head and rubs circles on my back. After 15 minutes, I finish throwing up and wash my mouth out, I walk out of the washroom and to Danny. Jake walked to Josh.

"How are you feeling?"

"I mean better than 15 minutes ago. But whatever you said to Jake, Thank you. I did give him a talk about how avoidant he has been. I asked and he never responded."

Danny nods and Sam comes running down the hallway and running right at me. He hugs me tightly.

"Oh hi then I guess." I say with a little laugh and hug him back.

"I heard you throwing up. Are you okay?"

"I would be better if you told the truth Sammy." I say sternly after pulling away. He looks down and nods.

"I am sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry about Samuel. Lying isn't going to do any good because the truth will always be uncovered once it is covered. You know this. I thought you were better than that." I walk off and go over to Jake. Jake and I went back to his room and lay in bed and watched movies all day considering I didn't feel well and was throwing up earlier today.

AN: Sorry I haven't updated ealier. It took awhile to think of an idea and then to write it. I have also been super busy lately. But I will post something on my wattpad page if I am unable to post. Goodnight loves!