A TWIST OF FATE || Rewriting

Ch. 70 || Giving Up

Damien 🥀

Trigger warning – Suicide Attempt

I twirled the fork inside the taco spaghetti that Lex had the chef made quickly and send it in the conference room. My wife is sitting on a chair and I'm sitting next to her on the open balcony. The wind is blowing her hair and the dim lights of the lamps on the wall illuminate us in the moonlight.

This place is highly secluded. there's no chance in hell anything can even fly in the air without us knowing it.

I put the fork near her mouth. She is looking nowhere, nothing, nor does she open her mouth for the bite.

"Zaria, have it." I say gently.

She doesn't respond. She is not even giving any emotion for me to read. It's really hard to get her to eat something. Ever since Thia died, Cade was the one who tried to feed her and even then, she only had so little of the food.

I take the fork down and place it back in the white bowl. "When I was trapped in the experiment, each day I spent there took a small chunk of my soul. It was my birthday when they kidnapped me and that's why I have stopped celebrating my birthdays." I start speaking, not sure if she is evening hearing me. I have seen Cade and Lex sharing stories with her just to get a reaction out of her.

"At first, I missed the way my mom's smile made her face glow, missed the days my father would take me out on weekends to teach me horse riding, missed the time when I would sneak into my father's home office at night and study the files to know more about the business, to build an empire by myself like he can never imagine, I missed having dreams to achieve. Days went by, months swiped away, and the torture became just as unbearable. No one came to my rescue.”

My chest pains remembering that time of my life but I continue, for her. "Day by day, my soul was turning dark, black, my heart was freezing in place. I made my pain my weapon as I held it tight against my wounds to remember it, to mark it as mine, to let it consume me entirely so I wouldn't feel any other pain. My dreams were shattered. Nothing made me feel warm anymore, not even my mother's smile.”

"When I found out about you, I hated you. With a lot of passion, I did hate you before, but the moment I saw you, in that moment, I did not feel the pain inside of me anymore. I had only seen your pictures and I had thought when I'll meet you, I will not be able to control my rage and might just hurt you, but seeing you was like I saw a lost part of me inside of you, my lost innocence, my inner child.”

"The child who had dreams and a heart of gold. You have shown me the colours that I had forgotten exist. All that bridge of hate for you that I had built inside of me shattered the moment your presence embraced me."

My voice coming out uneven and so fucking desperate. "How was I supposed to hate you when you're the only person I have fallen in love with through lifetimes?"

Her eyes twitched back at me. Life flickered in them for the first time in these past couple days. My heart warmed at the sight, my body felt a new world come to life at the sight of her movement that made my body heat and fuck, I have fallen in love with her all over again.

The wind turned even colder as thunder struck across the dark clouds at midnight. I gently take her hand in mine and squeeze it ever so softly.

"You can come back to life too, violence. Just know that, I am waiting for you. Whatever you let yourself become, I become that too. You are not alone; I am no different. We're one." I clenched my jaw tight as my eyes dampened.

I kiss her forehead. "I love you. I need you."

I lean back in my chair and take the bowl again. I twirled the spaghetti on the fork and moved it towards her lips. Her eyebrows narrowed and she studied the fork before slightly opening her mouth. A little smile tugs at the corner of my lips and I feed her the food. She looks like she doesn't even have energy to chew but little by little, she managed to eat.