Discovering myself (18+)

43. In my guts

Andrew's POV

That's what I get for caring about a girl's feelings, it must be karma, I should know it isn't in my blood to care about it.

What the hell has she put in that sauce?

Half of it was salt for sure, but what else? I shouldn't get sick from it.

Increase my blood pressure? Yes, but not throw up. 

Never, ever again have the courage of eating anything cooked by her? Yes again, but not having a stomachache.

I should simply migrate to the bathroom; I can't go too far from it anyway.

Quite a damage she has done, evidentially she hasn't obliged me eating everything, her and Dani's dish included. That is on me.

I'm a morrow. Kelsey's eyes start to get glossy and I act like a fucking hero, my superpower seems to be eating. Eating the most distasteful dish ever prepared by humankind. Great, at least I probably have saved two lives.

I'm fucking happy I always bring takeaways in our Thursday night meetings; I can affirm with a passion that it won't change. And after another round on the toilet, I can also affirm I won't be eating pasta any time soon.

I canceled my meetings for today, and that fucking adds a headache to the whole thing. With a full agenda, how should I make it five days in four? I'm a businessman not a fucking magician. There is no way I can perform any conference. In fact, they all hate my guts, something tells me they would be very pleased seeing me throwing it out.

Since I came here and have transformed the company and their business operation, we got more contracts, and it imposes them to work harder, to improve themselves, they all have that look on their face. I know the emotion quite well, hatred. The same look I have received from any girl I bedded. The look they give me when I'm hastily getting my things to leave, and they realize I won't ever call them. The look saying 'take your shitty clothes and stuff them in your ass before you leave'.

A video call from my sister halts my mundane thoughts. "Hey, look who is with me..." She turns the camera of her phone to the other side, showing nana on a bed, smiling at me, revealing even more the wrinkles on her eyes. Damn, I miss her. It is a fucking bless she is well and at home right now. I'm out of words watching her, relieved seeing her content and healthy.

This entire circumstance forces me to question what the hell am I doing here, it reminds me she won't be there forever and maybe I'm missing the last moments with her.

I felt fucking weak the entire week, shitty, unworthy because I'm far and couldn't help her as I should. I'm undeserving, ashamed to look at her right now.

"Oh, honey... I'm fine, look at me, I'm fine." She tells me with her weak voice, moving her arms all around her as she is showing me she could do anything. I laugh at her attempt.

"Nana..." Shit, I don't know what to say to her, what excuse to give, I should be there.

"She knows Andy," my sister starts talking," she knows how badly you wanted to come, she knows you couldn't."

I couldn't?

I fucking could, I should simply not listen to my father's worries and advice. Advice meaning threats, of course.

"Honey, are you okay? you look very palled and you are in bed in the middle of the day."

"I'm okay, just a little bit of stomach ache." When I say a little bit I really meant I'm fucking dying here, but hey, I shouldn't get her worried.