I felt like I could have done tons better with this, but it might just be cause the song is awesome. Seriously, Josh Francheschi sings it so flawlessly and effortlessly. It's amazing.
Anyways, thanks for reading and enjoy. :)
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“Always Attract” You Me At Six
The letter stills lays on my dresser. It’s all wrinkly from all the time I’ve held it and read it. It’s been there since I’ve received it.
Every time I see it, it stills breaks my heart even if it was already broken. It’s like a giant slap on the face and a laugh. It only adds salts to the wounds. I guess I should throw it away, but how can I?
How can I throw away the last thing that connects me to her, to the love of my life? She’s my soul mate- throwing away her letter just seems wrong. It doesn’t matter if she broke my heart into a million pieces. I could handle that. I could handle anything as long as she lived. She would always be my world.
Absentmindedly, I picked up the letter, running a hand over the ink. It wasn’t splotched with tears- I had cried into a tissue, the letter was to precious.
A faint smile passed through my lips, “I love you.” The words were a shadow, barely a whisper.
I briefly wondered what she was doing. Was she cuddling up to Frank? Was she warm and complete in his embrace?
I laid down on my bed in the darkness of my room. I let the tears flow down.
I wanted- Hell, I needed Fawn back. I needed her more than anything else in the world. I needed to see her. To talk things out- to love her. That’s all I needed. Just one last time. One last time… before everything was snatched away once again.
I let a sob escape my lips. I rolled over, my head ached so much that even the light that came from the laptop was hurting it. Everything hurt; the pain seemed eternal.
I walked silently downstairs, hoping not to wake anyone- especially my dad. Mom was still up, just like I knew she would be; she sat quietly on the old couch, reading a book. I sat on the edge of the couch and looked over at her.
“How’s my little soldier?” Mom asked, setting down her book and taking off her glasses. I knew she called me her little soldier, but in truth, I knew I was the cause of the wrinkles and gray hairs. I only caused her stress and trouble.
“I need to see Fawn.” I muttered, embarrassed. Perhaps it was time to get Fawn out of my head, just like my dad said. Maybe our love had only been in my head. My eyes were rimmed with red and puffy, the letter was still in my hands; I looked down, ashamed.
Mom looked at me, “Charlie.” Her eyes were tired and her hair was up in a sloppy bun. My being away had burdened this woman. She gave me a weary look with her pale, colorless eyes, “Do you love her?”
I nodded enthusiastically. At least with mom I could admit my feelings. I loved Fawn. “I love her.”
My mom ran a hand through her hair. She sighed, and picked up her book before sliding on her glasses. “Leave then. I’ll tell your dad in the morning.” Her words weren’t harsh, they were understanding.
I smiled and hugged her, kissing her gently on the forehead, “Mom, you need rest.”
She shooed me away, the corners of her mouth slightly upturned.
I hurried away, I needed to see Fawn. I had to see her.
*
I arrived in the morning. My eyes were clouding over with sleep and my limbs felt dead.
I knew exactly where she would be. Out on her jog. She always jogged- there was never an exception. I parked my car on a road she jogged through and got out. I sat on a nearby bench so that she could spot me. I smiled at myself, this was really happening. I would be seeing Fawn in a few minutes after months of being away. After months of pain, it will finally numb.
The early morning dampness had left the grass wet with dew. Every single water droplet seemed to shine in the early morning, they looked like teardrops made out of diamonds. The only tears shed today will be tears of joy.
I saw her before she saw me. She was jogging along easily; her blonde hair was up in a ponytail and her earphones in her ears. Her eyes were downcast, watching where she was going.
I stood up, a smile on my face. “Fawn.”
She looked up at the sound of her name. She was still as beautiful as I remembered, if not more. She gave me a small smile and slowed down, stopping fully a few feet away. She took her earphones out, her breathing wasn’t even but it wasn’t heavy either. It was just a bit off. “Charlie.”
“Hey,” I smiled, looking down.
She moved a bit closer, “Are you still in the army?”
I nodded. The army. It was my life. It had torn me away from my dad, and from her- from Fawn. “Yeah…”
She nodded, “Oh.”
After a moment of silence, I asked her, “How’s everything?”
“Good, great even.” Fawn’s blue eyes twinkled.. “”Things are good, Charlie. For you?”
“I’m managing.” I choked out, a giant lump forming in my throat. How could things be good when she wasn’t with me? Didn’t she love me still?
After a few uncomfortable moments, she added, abruptly, “Did you get my letter Charlie?”
I nodded, “Yes.”
She nodded. “I am engaged. Frank is great…” she trailed off, biting her lip. “What are you doing here, Charlie?”
“I still love you.” I murmured.
She stepped away from me, “I was serious, Charlie. I don’t love you that way anymore. I love Frank.”
“Frank’s a lucky man.” I muttered, feeling stupid. What was I doing here? What did I think I would accomplish?
Fawn nodded, she stepped back a bit more. She relocated her earphones as she said, “I should go.”
I nodded blindly.
She started jogging, calling over her shoulder, “Nice seeing you, Charlie!”
I wondered if she meant it.
It didn’t matter.
She didn’t love me.
