24- Not Good Enough

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From the kitchen she could hear the frustrated groan Neil let out. She bit her lip as she carried the plate over to the room. Neil had his back to her, his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose. JJ gently placed the plate down and slid her arms down from his shoulder to his chest. After a few seconds, she felt him relax and he dropped his hands. Slowly, she kissed up his shoulder to his jaw.

"I'm so sorry. If I had known you had work to do I never would have said yes to spending time with you today."

Neil tilt his head to the side to meet her lips. "I told you to stop apologising. There's a reason why I never told you I had work. I wanted to give you my undivided attention for a few hours and I would do the same thing again." He gently pulled her arm up and guided her in front of him. JJ furrowed her eyebrows as she tried to figure out what he was doing until he patted his thigh. Once she sat down, Neil tucked her head under his chin, kissed the top of her head and closed his eyes. "I'm not saying you call my daughter a burden. But it's hard enough dating someone when both of you have full time work and aspire to advance further. Finding time for each other can be difficult. But with Lara, you know she's my number one priority. Saturdays I spend with her, Sunday she goes to church with my mum and then it always end up being family time. The only time we really get to spend with each other is when you come back from work, I give you food, Lara steals you away from me until her bed time and then there's that. I just...I want you to know that maybe sometimes I can't give you things a normal relationship can but I'll try my damn hardest because like I've said a thousand times, you make me happy." Neil opened his eyes and kissed the top of her head again. "I just want you to be happy too."

"Neil, that's fucking absurd. You make me really happy. The both of you."

When he didn't say anything, she moved her head away so she could look him in the eye. "I just...there are people who can treat you so much better than I can and I just have this thought that you'll upgrade and..." He didn't finish the sentence. "Forget it. I'm sorry. Let me just-" She shook her head with a frown. 

"Don't do that. You can't just start being open and then close off. You listen to me and you listen good, Neil Zampa. I am happy. I am so incredibly happy." She cupped his cheeks as she leaned down to rest her forehead against his. "You may not be able to give me your full undivided attention like anyone else but God is my witness when I say you have treated me the best any man has and ever will. There is no upgrade from you, Neil. I am falling for you. You alone. Your terrible, terrible dad jokes, the way I catch you staring at me from across the room, your fucking love for windows and numbers. You practically took care of me the week and a half when I had the ear infection. You let me into your home just to use you to cuddle but knew when to give me space, you fed me and you made me laugh. So don't you ever think you're not treating me right. So yeah, now we'll forget this, you're gonna eat the sandwich and finish your work and when you're done we will cuddle and fall asleep." Before he could reply she pressed her lips against his. She felt him smile into the kiss as his hands slowly made their way to her hair. "If there is a problem, we will be grown ups and we will talk and we will talk things through to try and fix things. I'm not just gonna leave one day."

He watched as she slowly got off his lap. "Hey cara?" She looked back and smiled. "Thank you." JJ smiled wider before walking to the bed. He turned the chair fully to face her and watched until she settled in, fluffing the pillows and patting away the creases of the duvet. Neil shook his head with a smile before standing up and marching towards her. "I just really want another kiss."

"Your wish is my command."

* * *

Two hours later, Neil turned off his laptop. He looked towards the bed and saw JJ reading a book. "You done babe?" Her voice was tired. Neil groaned as he stood up, he put his glasses back in the case and finally made his way towards her. Along the way, he turned off the light and then finally crept in beside her. JJ put the book down on the drawer. Neil sighed as he looked down at her before leaning in for a kiss. During the kiss, he pushed himself harder, letting his hands slide under her t-shirt.

With his hands still roaming her waist, he let his lips trail down to her neck. "You know, if you weren't on your period and I wasn't half asleep I totally would have fucked you right now. Nice and slow and hard."

JJ giggled as she felt him pull away. He kissed her lips again, this time being very gentle. Their lips were barely touching but it still drove JJ crazy. "If we have enough time tomorrow I will give you a blow job." He grazed his lips against hers causing JJ to whimper. Neil groaned at the noise before pushing his lips against hers once again.

"You know I feel bad if you give me something I can't return. I just...we wake up early tomorrow, shower sex it is, okay? I just missed you. I mean the pictures are good and all but God can you do amazing things." He felt JJ slowly run her hands up his thigh so he had to bite back the moan. He kissed up her jaw to her ear when she finally slid her hands through his shorts. "Cara," he groaned in her ear.

"Can we go to the bathroom now?" JJ whispered as he gently kissed her ear. Neil fully rolled on top of her. He than sat up, reached into the bedside drawer and pulled out a condom. "Or not."

"I know your back is starting to hurt because of your cramps, even though I told you to tell me, which you didn't which is another topic we will bring up later. My only worry was about having period sex is the blood soaking through the mattress. I'm going to get a few old towels and I'm still gonna fuck you right without making your back worse by getting you in the bath." Whilst Neil was gone, JJ pulled the duvet off her. She began to take off her t-shirt when Neil came in. "Urm, you know how much I enjoy taking off your clothes so why are you stripping that away from me? No pun intended." With a tired smile, he pulled her up from the bed and lay the towels out. JJ saw the hesitant look in his eyes so before she lay down, she held his hand.

"You know, I can endure shower sex. My back isn't that bad yet. Or you don't even have to do this. You said you would think about it so I wasn't expecting an answer today."

Neil turned to face her. He loosely wrapped his arms around her and smiled. "I don't know why I'm telling you this and it'll probably come to bite me back in the arse but I looked up a few things today. Of course I already knew some women like sex during their periods but I never looked at the science behind it. I wanted to look it up and see the best way to do it to make it comfortable for you and if there is anything is particular you would prefer. And then," he said softly as he leaned in closer to her ear, "I know exactly how horny you are anyways so...and plus, I would feel really bad if you couldn't get any release from me because I didn't try something out. Like I said, I want you to be happy and also satisfied. And anyways, I really like the part where I satisfy you," he said with a smirk. "But we'll try it out and if it doesn't work then we will try another way next time. It's not fair for you to stop having fun just because you're on your period."

* * *

JJ groaned as she looked around the room. "Neil get your ass here now." He chuckled as he made his way towards her. Once he got into bed, he lay his head down on JJ's chest and closed his eyes. His arm wrapped around her waist and she sighed. Resting her head on top of his, she lifted a hand and started to run it through his hair.

"Thank you babe," JJ whispered. "You're gonna say you didn't do anything but you went out your way tonight." His hand travelled down to her thigh where he slowly traced back up. "Another round?"

"As much as I would love to, I will have to pass. I am absolutely knackered and we have only got three hours to go to sleep."

"Neil you have work. Shut up and go to sleep." Neil rest his hands back on her waist and smiled before leaning up to kiss the bottom of her jaw. "But babe?"

"Yes cara?"

"Goodnight."

"Goodnight beautiful."

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