A game, or real life? (Ezio x reader)

There cannot be happiness without grief

A/N: whooo, I hated writing this chapter. Good luck! Tissues and patience are recommended. 

Also, for those of you who don't know, the picture above is from the real Château du Clos Lucé in Amboise, France, where Leonardo lived for the last years of his life.

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My dearest diary,

My hand froze before the blank page of my journal. What should I write about? For the first time in years, my mind was blank. I had no problems to vent out onto my journal anymore, so...what should I write? Taking a deep breath, I dipped my quill in the pitch-black ink once more before I hovered it above the paper, the fluctuating glow of the small candle burning before me making the quill's shadow dance. Hell, I should just write what comes to my mind.

It has been several months, hasn't it? It's the twins' 26th birthday, yet here I am in my bedroom, my fingers itching to write. Aurora and Leandro have grown so much over the years. Leandro is going to marry Diana in the following weeks, while Aurora and Yusuf have only been getting closer and closer. Even now, as my quill scratches the paper, I can hear their muffled laughter coming through my open bedroom window. Leandro too, seems to have grown fond of him. He already treats him like an older brother. And while my heart flutters with happiness at the sight of my children accepting him like a long-forgotten member of our family, my heart aches at the idea of him leaving. His home is in Istanbul. I know that, and everyone knows that. But how would they take his departure? I fear for them.

Tomorrow, Ezio and I will properly start cutting off loose ends so that we may enjoy our retirement in peace. But there is still so much to be done. I need to influence the Assassins to settle down in the New World as soon as possible, as there might still be a chance on preventing the Templars from taking over the United-States, but how can I? This is still only 1512. By now, the North America that I once knew is but a wasteland, inhabited by "savages", or "Indians". If I recall my history classes properly, the first British colony was in the early 1600's. 1605? Or was it 1607? I can't remember anymore. It's been so long... but my point still stands. I need to convince the Assassins that going to the New World with the first British colony is of the highest importance. But will they even believe me? I hope they will. I pray they will.

"(y/n)?" A sudden, familiar voice reached my ears, immediately followed by the light creaking of the bedroom door. My quill froze as it hovered above the page, but regardless of how unexpected that voice was, a smile still tugged at the corners of my lips. Damn you, Ezio... I placed the quill down before I looked at my dashing newcomer, giving him a tender smile as his heavy footsteps grew nearer. Ohh, when was the last time I saw him wearing normal clothes? Back in Monteriggioni, I'd say, back, way back before things went suddenly downhill. Short, graying strands of hair fell before his eyes as he gazed down at me. They'd gotten a bit longer, but I knew it wouldn't last. He'd probably ask me to cut them once more. "What are you doing up here, tesoro (darling)?" he asked with a tender smile as he stopped behind me, and before he even let me turn around to meet his gaze, I was kept in place by a pair of strong arms that slithered into their rightful place around my waist. I closed my eyes and leaned back into his strong presence, just as I felt his tender lips leaving a soft kiss against the top of my head. "Everyone is asking for you downstairs..."

"I know, but..." I shrugged as I looked down at my open journal. "I needed to write. It has been so long since I last grabbed my quill."