XXXIV. (nsfw)

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"Multi famam, conscientiam, pauci verentur." -Pliny

Many fear their reputation, few their conscience.

Eddy was pacing around the living room. The moment that he and Brett saw Alexander and Belle on the kitchen that faithful morning, he felt a pang in his heart. The emotion sat heavy on his chest that he could feel it pressing down on his stomach, making him physically sick.

How will I tell Brett about Irene?

He thought as he promised himself to Brett Yang only. He promised Brett Yang a blessing in the future in front of his father. Brett Yang promised to ask for the blessing of their relationship from Eddy's mother.

How could I do this when Brett does not even know about Irene yet?

Mama Chen would not accept them, too. His reputation in the family would be shamed. Mama Chen would be ashamed of him and will disown him. His pride will be incinerated the moment they find out he is a homosexual. He will even be executed once someone else knows about them.

Eddy Chen came to one decision. He had to break up with Brett even if it is hard. He was so in love with Brett but they could not be. Family will last forever and if he picked Brett, Brett might leave him alone.

He cannot risk family so he is sticking to his decision. He will break up with Brett and continue the relationship with Irene. That way, he could have a partner that his family could approve of. Specially for his mom, Eddy just wants to please his mom.

He does not have to just break up with Brett. He needs to break Brett's heart so that Brett would hate him. It was better that way. It was good too since he would not be expected to mend the broken pieces of Brett's heart. It is a good idea.

The first thing he has to do is distance himself from Brett. He needs to keep him away and far from arms reach when not necessary, but also not denying him of any contact that they got used to. So that it would not be suspicious of what Eddy is really planning.

It is a bad plan but he has to make his mom proud.

Even if letting go of a once of a lifetime type of a love, he would do it to please his mom. He loves Brett, he really does. He just cannot pursue it further because his mother and family would disown him. Besides, he was not to lose a love because he has Irene Leung.

Eddy thought that he could do it.

Every time he sees Brett, it seems as though he is always pulled in to his gravity. His force stronger than anyone else that Eddy had ever met. Brett loved the same way he breathed, blinked, slept and ate. It comes to him naturally.

It is no wonder why Eddy is always pulled in. He was loved so easily and he cannot help but love him back, too. He cannot tell him physically. Brett will know that he is lying. He knows what to do now.

He needs to make Brett hate him. He needs to allow Brett to hate him to the point that he cannot even look at him. This was a bad plan that cannot be changed. He had an excuse since he was already graduating.

- - - - -

Eddy went to Brett's house, knowing they were to meet today. After Brett opened the door for him, he immediately entered. They would always be in the bedroom, whether they were conversing or doing something a bit more unholy. It was their sanctuary.

Eddy was quick to kiss Brett, it was a good kiss too. Almost apologetic, but Brett did not seem to mind. The kiss was slow and passionate, Eddy was taking his time to relish the sensations. Brett was allowing him to lead the kiss and Eddy cannot be more delighted.

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