Friends || BTS

Chapter 37: The Hell Did I Get Myself Into?

"Speak." I said angrily but no one did. "Fine. I'll ask." I looked at Hoseok. "Did you apologize?" He was about to answer when Yoongi interrupted him.

"He did but I will not accept the apology until he breaks up with that witch." Yoongi explained.

"But I did. You just wouldn't hear me out." Hoseok spoke.

"What a change of heart." Tae said in a low voice which made me snap my fingers at him.

"Don't speak unless spoken to." I scolded Tae. "Elaborate." I said after shifting my gaze towards Hoseok.

"It was all a mistake from the start. It didn't feel right but it was the safe choice. I knew she'd walk away eventually but at least I knew the outcome."

I thought I was the safe choice.

"I was afraid to commit to something so good as I believed it was too perfect and I ended up sabotaging something amazing all by myself." He broke my heart as he explained his point of view. He was never used to something going so right with any of his relationships so it felt weird when he had me. "You didn't deserve that. You don't. You don't deserve me. I know I broke you but if you have it in your heart to forgive me, I just want my best friend back. Just that." He said and I couldn't help but feel sorry for him. He's broken, his past relationships broke him and I wished I could help him fix what's left of him but I didn't know if I could.

"Let's talk about it later. I don't think it's about us right now." I sounded colder than I intended.

"Anyways. When Yuna snapped at me, at us last night. It was a wakeup call, she's right. Seohyun is not worth losing any of you. You guys are my family. You've always stood by me and I took that for granted. I'm sorry." He apologized.

"Are you sure you guys broke up? Because I saw her going to your penthouse while I was walking out." I said remembering Yoongi's phone. I pulled it out of my pocket and have it to him. They all looked back at Seok.

"She didn't take it very well. She said I was blinded by you." He said embarrassed. "She kept nagging about how we belong together and how everyone was being tricked by Yuna."

Wow, that bitch.

"Hyung, are you sure about this? You won't have any second thoughts?" Taehyung asked.

"I'm sure. She no longer has that effect on me." Hoseok answered as he searched for my eyes but I avoided him. I think I'm better being single for the rest of my life than being in a relationship that could ruin such beautiful friendships.

"Then what are we gonna do if she keeps showing up? We can't just ignore her." What Tae said got us all worried. He's right, we can't.

"She got pictures. Proof that we hung out. With the press bickering and digging scandals, she can easily manipulate stories in her favor." Jimin explained. We all went silent for a few minutes.

"Not unless..." Kook explained a way, a plan to rectify the situation.

The days went by as the boys were busy with the choreography, video shooting, promotions and so on. As expected, I wasn't exactly needed for the choreo. Jimin and Hoseok designed it and I was just there to support them, I guess.

Although they were all on good terms, I could still feel the tension between some of them. I only confirmed it when I was walking past their practice room and overheard them talking.

"You guys have to make up. This is not gonna work, you're making everyone feel uncomfortable. Even Yuna noticed but she's afraid to ask." Joon was playing his role as a leader.

"Fine, did you make a move on her?" Hoseok asked.

"No. Do you think I'd stoop that low? And even if I did, that's clearly none of your business. It stopped being that when you kissed another girl." Joon called out for Tae but Tae ignored him and continued. "You promised you'd take good care of her, you knew I had and still have feelings for her, you knew I suppressed my emotions because I genuinely thought that you'd make her happy. And then what? You used her just like that?" Taehyung scoffed after his own words before proceeding his argument. "You hit me when I got drunk and kissed her but I thought it was okay because she had feelings for you and I thought I deserved it. I thought you were better than this hyung. I was ready to give up on the girl of my dreams for you because you're my brother. I thought you'd take good care of her but you didn't." His voice cracked at the last sentence. "Do you have any idea how I felt when I heard she was admitted into a hospital? How everything went black and all I wanted to do was be her strength? See her awake? I wanted her to wake up and scold me for hitting you in the face?" I could hear him crying and it only broke my heart. I didn't know he felt that way.

"I know I made a mistake and I beat myself up for it every single day. I apologized, a thousands of times, I hate myself for waking up after what I did but what do you want me to do? How can I fix the mess I made?" Hoseok sounded as broken as Taehyung. I felt so guilty for coming between them like that. I felt so stupid for thinking it was okay to date one of them. I made a decision then and there that I wouldn't act on my feelings ever again. Especially when it comes to those men.

"Nothing hyung, just do nothing. I will keep my feelings suppressed and I suggest you do the same. She deserves better than that. We all know it." Taehyung said before walking up to his hyung and taking him in his embrace.

"I warned you about hurting her. But I guess you shouldn't be the only one to blame." Yoongi said all of a sudden and caused the others to look back at him. "What? There's Seohyun to blame. I'm not saying you're not guilty, you're just stupid and driven by your dumb insecurities." He continued. "But all is good as long as we get rid of that witch and keep my baby sister happy and safe. Okay?" They nodded in agreement with his final statement.

By the time they ended their argument and continued their practice, I was in tears. I ran off to the ladies' room and let my tears find their way out. I had a lot to cry about, the pain of seeing Hoseok kissing another girl, Taehyung having feelings for me but stepping on those feelings because he thought I was happy without knowing and lastly, knowing that I had feelings for Taehyung but couldn't and wouldn't make a single move because that would always end up in bad blood.

I hated how I knew that Taehyung was the perfect guy, he's considerate, he's caring, he's always been there for me but I was just blinded by the thought of being in a relationship with my best friend. I hated how perfect he is, how it felt right with him, how I knew that my feelings for him were stronger and more intense than I've ever felt for anyone before but I also despised how I could never act on my feelings for him. Nor will he act on his feelings for me.

What the hell did I get myself into?