A Little More Of Love.

Chapter 16: Mint Chocolate Vs Cookie N Cream

♡ L I L Y ♡

After that day, he never contacted me, and our texts became infrequent to nonexistent. It's better this way, I keep telling myself that, and with the date of the company event approaching, I immerse myself into my work so that I do not think of him every breath I take. 

It pained me to turn around and kept walking that day. 

No matter what he says so sweetly and words that sway me towards him, I can't magically be happy after living a cursed life. However, it's so strange how a single person can shake up my life and make me realize how lonely I have been and how much I have been enduring throughout, and it's stranger than before how I want to fight to be happy just once in this life.

"Woah, you're going to have a nosebleed with the amount of work you put in today!" someone exclaims, bringing me out of my trance as I look up to see Taylor leaning against the door with her arms crossed. 

I shrug at the blood-soaked cotton balls in the bin when she straightens up and enters as she grimaces, "Ew, oh my, you need to go take a break." 

I shake my head and mutter, "No, I do not. I need to finish this, and then I have that other thing Zara told me about."

She clicks her tongue, "Actually, Zara is the one who called me to take you away." 

Surprised, I gape at her. 

"What?" 

She looks at me and huffs, "Lily, you have been acting like a machine, and it's crazy. Stop it and take a break, or else you don't know what will happen!" 

I narrow my eyes and run my hand through my hair as I sigh, "I don't; ugh, I am trying not to think about anything is all I want, and by working, I can do that." 

She steps forward and asks, "Why not? What's troubling you that —" when I brusquely blurt out, "Because I keep replaying what happened and what I did to him." 

"Woah!" Taylor gasps, and I blink and frown at her. "What?" 

She straightens and clears her throat, "Oh, I am surprised you admitted defeat without me probing you to accept that you just miss a certain someone." I ludicrously gape at her and scoff at her preposterous suggestion, crossing my arms, "Admitting defeat? What is there to admit, and what is there for me to lose — or win?" 

Taylor leans in and whispers, "Sweetie! You have no idea, but you are making it quite obvious." 

I blink and snap, "Making what obvious?" "That you clearly miss Alastair." she tilts her head and smirks after dropping a bomb by saying his name, and my heart unsteadily beats. Then, I blink, shake my head and cough, "What? What are you talking about? I just said I can't stop thinking about how I treated — and that's what you inferred from that." 

"Knowing you for two years," Taylor clears her throat and speaks to me, "I can tell you that you have pushed him away, and you have drawn yourself back into the safety cocoon because things got unpredictable for you. You are building a much higher wall because you think that's the best way to protect you and your heart."

"What the heck!" I snap. 

She shrugs and snorts, "But, girl, your walls are already pretty high." 

I narrow my eyes and think of a snarky comeback, only to sulk and sigh, "Ugh, Tay, I don't know what to do. I thought I was doing the right thing by putting distance between us, but the look on his face the last time I saw him constantly burns in the back of my mind." 

I run a hand through my hair and scoff, "I keep thinking that he must be hurting. No matter how hard I try, I just can't stop thinking about him — how can I go to be strangers with someone when I have been thinking about him all the time?"