Sorry, I'm an Anti-Romantic (DAERIN)

33

Haerin's POV

The weight of my secret has been crushing me, suffocating me under the weight of my lies. Deep down, I know the truth: I don't think I can love someone without hurting them.

Despite the strong feelings I have for her, the fear of becoming like my father is overwhelming. The thought of me in pain and the idea of begging for their attention or shedding tears over them makes me feel sick to my stomach. Even the slightest hint of jealousy consumes me like a cancer, eating away at me until I am nothing but a shell of who I used to be.

Yes, I don't want to get hurt.

It's painful to admit, but I know what I have to do. I have to stay away from her, no matter how much it hurts. I am the problem, and I know that I can't love properly. My doubts and insecurities have taken over, making it impossible for me to express my feelings in a healthy way.

But even though I know it's the right thing to do, it still hurts. I thought that knowing she would stop chasing me would make things easier, but it only makes the pain more intense. Maybe they were right to call me Miss Aromantic, as it seems I am incapable of expressing my love towards anyone.

It would be better if I just stayed away from everyone, holding myself apart from the messy complications of love.

Minji keeps pushing me to tell the truth, but I resist because I know that if she finds out I love Danielle, she'll push me towards her again.

I know that my love is unhealthy, and that I need to stop this cycle before I hurt myself even more. Just seeing her with someone almost made me crazy, what more on something worse.

Perhaps, it would be better if I'll just unlove her for real so we both don't hurt each other.

The whole crowd turned their head to the brown haired girl with a wolf cut. They didn't recognize her at first, her soft aura before turned into strong one. People leave in awe as they noticed that the Aussie girl gives them attention unlike before that she'll ignore them.

Only weeks had passed, but she seems like she already moved on from what happened. Their circle of friends keeps hanging out, but Danielle wouldn't come if Haerin is with them and the same goes with Haerin. They're avoiding each other since then, their friends thought that it would be better for them for everyone's peace of mind. But Hanni and Minji are still bothered by what happened.

Hanni can't believe what she's witnessing, she knows how her friend really loves that cat-eyed girl. But she'll just support her in her fast moving on because she couldn't do anything also. Minji on the other hand, stops talking about Danielle on Haerin. She couldn't understand her, but she thought it was for their own good to stop seeing each other. She noticed that the Aussie girl is now slowly regaining herself as smile flustering on her face, but it seems not genuine but she shakes it off.

Danielle became always the highest on every quizzes, projects and exams. She focused on studying making everyone surprised by her hidden capability.

Loud footsteps made the students get out of the way. The president seems serious early in the morning. The sight of her past lover made her cringe, Danielle hate seeing that face. She was about to turn her back, but the latter spoke.

" Don't you know the school rules?" Haerin asked, making Danielle roll her eyes. The students gossips at the corner as she threw death glares again and showed an evil smile after.

" I know everything about our school rules, Miss President" she replied seems bored with the lame conversation.

" Then why did you dye your hair. Only black hair is allowed here" she sternly uttered and Danielle just laughed at her. People wondered what's funny about her words.