Fin's Claim

I'm Sorry

Victoria's POV

Mornings first scent arouses me, the tip of his toes touching my heel.. The feel of his heart beating against my back, steady and slow gives me a comfort....Limbs tangles together, his arm draped over my chest, fingers tucked in against my skin holding me close.

A protective shield that's wrapped around me...breeding the feeling of security in him...I snuggle closer, cocooning myself in his embrace.

Lips gently brush against my neck...seeking nothing more than a kiss.

Our thundering chaos is gradually turning into a simple melody...the invisible strings that bind us together are weaving and braiding themselves tighter and tighter...The darken path of our self-imposed isolation and separation are turning lighter as our curved bond is trying to straighten itself out, the moon looks on with a knowing smile.

"How are you feeling?" His sleepy voice hums into me and I smile to myself.

"Better."

"How's the wolf?" He questions it out concerned for her as well."

This perks her up slightly...I can feel her inside me stretching with her front paws first then her hind legs, giving herself a shake...If he could see her, he would see her fur matted down and sticking up in all different directions as if she just woke up from a three-day bender, not knowing where she's at.

Laughing low in my ear he likes my analogy of her... He likes that she's not always teeth and claw...

This elicits a low playful growl from her before starting to groom herself. We're both taken by surprise at her reaction to him....it's just a subtle shift in her but it's felt heavily in the both of us.

"She called me Victoria...." He sounds amazed by that fact...

"I know, and you didn't let her down...." He's the catalyst for our bonds roots starting to take hold. He's feeding it with his souls nectar....sweet and thick it's hard to not soak it up greedily and grow from it.

"What happened Victoria?" Impossibly close he holds me against him...impossible secure is what I feel...

"They can't help themselves Fin, they get seduced by the power my wolf can give them...I don't want them around me.... no matter what...the temptation is too great for them to fight. In my old pack, my father allowed our healer to touch me all the time...she was like a sponge constantly absorbing my strength and my father allowed this. I wasn't as strong this way. I killed her when I took over...my wolf ate her for days.." I cringe at my admission...remembering how the wolf gorged herself on that tainted meat.

He doesn't say anything about my admission seeing nothing wrong with eating what you can, instead, he feels guilty for leaving me there..not coming to rescue me. Deep down he knew what my life was like, he knew what was happening to me underneath my father's rule....yet he somehow felt at the time it was justifiable..that I deserved everything I got....my heart clenches with his thoughts of the past..his belief that I was not worth protecting...

"I'm sorry Victoria, I wish I could go back and do thing differently." Regret, self-loathing are all strong emotions that are swirling inside him.

Shame, sullies his soul over and over again with his sweaty, dirty, intimate acts with others that he justified to himself as a punishment to me...He knew his transgression would be whispered into my ears...Every time he would seek out the company of another, he would smile out knowing how much he was hurting me..he wanted me to hurt just like him.

He wanted to shame me behind closed doors, so I would be humiliated in public...He knew what he was doing, he knew what my father was doing and still, at the time, he still thought is was not enough punishment.