Conversations In The Dark

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Ana sat up in her bed in the recovery bay. The curtains were open so she could see the pitch black night sky. It was comforting. 

For the first time since she woke up 3 days ago, Ana was alone. There was always someone by her side wether that was Natasha or one of the others. It was 2am and everyone was asleep in their individual rooms which gave the girl sometime to be alone with her thoughts; to process. 

Normally Ana would have been troubled by the things that had happened to her if she was left alone, but this time there was something more prominent on her mind. Stark. 

What she would give to have her hands wrapped around that man's neck watching the life slowly drain out of his eyes. Or if she stabbed him in the stomach and waited for him to bleed out on the floor in front of her. 

He took something from Ana when he traded her away to her worst nightmare. He broke her trust in people. Never again would she let men like him betray her like that. Never. 

Ana took the wires off of her skin and pulled the IV out of her arm. She got out of the bed and snuck down the hallway. Her powers told her that Steve was on the 5th floor of the palace and he was sleeping soundly in his bed. Ana used her invisibility to ensure that she wouldn't be seen by one of the Dora Milaje on her way. The girl slipped carefully passed one of the patrols and made it onto the right floor. 

She turned the handle slowly and jarred the door open just enough to fit through before closing it quietly. Steve's phone laid on his dresser. Ana took cautious steps over and picked it up. The girl walked into the en suite, taking a seat on the floor beside the door. 

The phone had no passcode, which wasn't very smart for an Avenger and Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D but at this point it was advantageous. Ana scrolled through his contacts and found Tony's name. 

'We found Ana. We need your help, Tony. Believe me I wouldn't be asking if it wasn't important.' The message read and Ana sent it. She then deleted the chat so Steve wouldn't see it on his phone. 

Ana crept back into the room and placed the phone back on the dresser where she had found it. Steve was still asleep and breathing heavily. He was so still when he slept; the only movement coming from the rise and fall of his chest. His hair still remained perfect though. 

The girl left the room and closed the door with a small click. As she was walking down the hallway, back to the recovery wing, she saw that one door was ajar. Curious, Ana peered inside; it was Bucky's room. The man was asleep so Ana decided to continue down the hall. 

"Can't sleep?" Bucky's voice came quietly from his room. 

Ana turned around and stood in the doorway. The man had flipped over now and was facing in her direction. She turned off her invisibility and walked in. He made space on the bed for her to sit.

"How did you know I was there?" Ana asked and Bucky sat up.

He looked down and chuckled, "I always know when someone's watching me, wether I can see them or not." 

The man leaned over and flicked the lamp on the bedside table on. The room lit up with a dull glow. Ana could now see that Bucky wasn't wearing a shirt. A myriad of scars covered the surface of his skin. Ana couldn't tear her eyes away from them. This made Bucky nervous and he got up to put a shirt on. 

"Sorry." Ana said guiltily.

Bucky smiled gently, "It's okay, I get it. They surprise people."

Ana cleared her throat, "Can I ask you a question?" 

"Sure."

Ana looked at her hands, "How long were you at HYDRA?" 

Bucky paused for a second but then said, "About 70 years."

The girl felt this man's pain. She thought she had been at HYDRA a long time but 70 years was incomparable. There was a moment of silence between the pair. Neither of them knew what to say. Ana didn't know if she should attempt to comfort the man, but what good would that do really. There was nothing that could make his situation less damaging. She could tell by his face that all that trauma was still fresh even after all these years of being free. But something that inhumane never leaves you. It can't. 

"Do you still get nightmares?" Ana asked.

He nodded, "They come and they go. But they get better, less real."

"When I was in the coma, it was like I was there, at the facility." Ana told him.

He looked upon her sympathetically and she continued, "They tried to erase my memory, but it didn't work. Again and again they would try but everything was still there. Somedays, I would just wish that I would forget so it could stop."

"When I was on a mission, I saw Steve. I recognised him. Then when we got back to base they erased my memory. I let them erase my memory. You know they used to tell me that it made me stronger, not being bound by the memories of my past." Bucky chuckled and shook his head. 

He looked the girl in the eye, "The people we love are the reason we survived. Even if part of our brain didn't know it, I believe that some part of our being remembered them to keep us alive."


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