umbrella { sunjay }

27.

"what does pregnant mean?" eunjoo innocently questioned as she ate her morning cereal. sunoo didn't have the energy to cook any real food for them this morning.

sunoo continued to swirl his cereal around in his bowl with his spoon. not hearing anything his daughter had said. there were too many loud thoughts in his mind.

"daddy!" she raised her voice to gain the man's attention. luckily it worked and his surprised eyes looked towards her finally.

"hm?"

"what does pregnant mean?" she repeated her question once again.

sunoo stared at her for a moment as he blinked slowly. he got flashbacks from when eunji told him of her pregnancy and now, when sena told him the same thing.

"it's um-" he tried to find the words that seemed lost in his throat. 

"it's when a woman has a baby in her belly." he gave the best smile he could muster.

"how does the baby get there?" she tilted her head.

sunoo's eyes widened slightly as he heard her ask. he thought this conversation would be way down the line and he'd have time to prepare himself.

"uh..." he looked around the table, trying to find an age appropriate answer to tell his four year old.

"we can talk about this conversation when you get older, okay?" he bargained. 

"okay." she shrugged and continued to eat her cereal as before.

this morning, both of them sat in silence. eunjoo could feel a difference in her father the way he stared blankly at the salt and pepper shakers on the table. she would never understand any of it, but she could feel it.

"are you sad?" 

eunjoo looked towards the couch where sunoo's body was sprawled out as he stared at the ceiling.

"i don't know, joo." his voice wasn't the same energetic and fun tone that he tried to use with the little one. this time, it was melancholic and filled with somber.

"do you want to play with me?" she held up her barbies to offer. she thought, if he played with the toys, he would feel better. toys always made her feel happy when she's sad.

"not right now baby." he didn't spare her a glance.

her little lips formed a pout. her father never turned down a good barbie. something was very wrong.

"is mr. park having a baby?" eunjoo tried to think about what could have possibly made her father sad. she just remembers the expression sunoo had as they walked home after meeting the woman.

she heard the name 'jay' and knew that was heera's uncle's name. her brain tried to put the pieces together.

after a while, she realized she wasn't going to receive an answer from her father.

now she was sad too.

placing down her toys, she walked over to the sofa and plopped down onto sunoo. forcing him into a cuddle session. cuddles were also on her list of mood-fixers.

"it's okay to be sad, daddy." she patted his arm as she hugged him. all the years of sunoo comforting and holding her rubbed off on her. and now it's her turn to comfort him.

"i love you, eunjoo-ah." he stated as he brought her closer.

sunoo was confused himself. he had no idea why he suddenly felt so depressed after finding out the park family was soon to become three. it was supposed to be a good thing. jongseong had told him he wanted a family.