Chapter 31 - Illegitimacy Or Marriage

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As we reach home, I quietly try to make my way towards Zaaf's room. I can't stay in a room with Asher anymore. I'll sleep on the floor but not in HIS room.

Expecting Zaaf to be asleep as I reach towards her room, I hear her and Asher talking.

Ughh why couldn't you be in your own stupid room Asher?

Instead of thinking about what to do next my worst habit of eavesdropping came into action as soon as I heard my name in their conversation.

"Asher I love Anaya. She's like my sister BUT.. Ujala IS my sister. She has already done so much to help Anaya and to be honest, I want Anaya to be happy too but not at the stake of Ujala's life. Knowing Ujala, she would happily sacrifice her life for Anaya but hasn't she already sacrificed enough in life?" Zaaf said.

" I wouldn't let anything harm Ujala or the baby. They are my responsibility and I understand very well the consequences of my decision.
I'm just worried if Anaya will understand this. Will she be able to handle it? "

Why do you care now Asher Ibrahim?

" She's a strong woman. I'm sure she'll understand.. She knows she wasn't supposed to be your wife forever. In fact, she doesn't even deserve all this drama Asher. She's a wonderful girl and she deserves to have a stress-free life with her family and a partner who loves her and who's not temporary. "

I don't know why but Zaaf's reply kind of crushed me. She's right, I don't deserve this torture but.. why do I want it so bad?

" Asher, do you love Anaya? " Zaaf asked.

I shouldn't be listening, whatever his answer would be it'll hurt. Anaya please don't listen, please go away.
This is torturous.

"If you do, I'll tell Ujala. I'm sure she'll understand. I'm just worried for her but you've been through so much yourself. I don't want you to sacrifice your love." Zaaf continued.

"No"

"Huh?"

"No, I don't love her." Asher replied smoothly.

And I just fell on my weak legs.

" Anaya? " Sumair whispered from behind.

" Sumair, will you take me to my room please?" I whispered back as tears rolled my eyes.

"Sure."

He helped me to get back on my feet and took me to my room. I needed someone to console me and stay with me but since I've made Sumair awkward enough times by crying in front of him I decided to spare him just this once and wish him good night as he leaves.

Now that I'm alone in the room, my eyes travel to the huge bed placed in the middle of our room.. Asher's room actually. All the memories start to play like a movie in my head.. I SLEPT IN HIS ARMS!!

Will I ever be able to feel the warmth of his body again?

Suddenly, I felt disgusted with myself. I was fantasizing about a man who is bringing a life into this world with another woman. The man who lied to me, who played with my feelings, and who was such a fraud that he looted me with any ounce of emotion left in my soul.

I quickly pack all my clothes in a bag and began to leave the room. He and I cannot sleep in the same room anymore, in fact, he and I cannot be under the same roof anymore.

I prayed hard that I don't bump into him in the hallways. Quietly making my way downstairs, I was having a mental debate on what to do next.
After some internal debate, I decided to spend some time in the kitchen drinking cold water, which might help me figure out my life.

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