Big girls don't cry (Aleida series #1)

30. Rising anxiety

Aleida POV

"So, would you like to explain?" Kian asks.

"Not really, no."

"Why won't you talk to us!?"

"Because you don't understand! You never listen to what I say; you all just say that it's going to be better without even knowing why I'm hurting in the first place! You have no right to either judge me or say that you understand me when you know fucking nothing about me or my life!" I scream at Kian; he looks taken aback by my answer, and he is now looking apologetic. "Don't even start to apologize. I'm sick and tired of people apologizing, saying that they don't know. That's because I don't tell you; I don't want others to judge me. I don't want people to look at me with sympathy or some other shit. I'm me, and if that ain't enough, then all of you can fucking go to hell! See if I care."

I storm out of the room and run towards the forest. Without caring for my clothes, I shift, and my attire is now lying on the ground, in shreds. My paws are pounding on the damp ground. The only thing that circulates inside my head is that I have to get somewhere where I can be alone for a while, which doesn't seem to take long.

I hear others behind me; I guess it's Kian and Miliano. Right now, I don't care. With all the muscles I have, I increase the pace and run faster than ever before. I don't slow down until I reach a clearing full of wildflowers and tall grass with a nearby stream.

I lay down under the tree with the head on my paws and wait for my mates to appear to continue scolding me. Miliano is the first one to appear. He slowly paws up to me, and when I don't react, he lays down next to me with his head on my back. He licks behind the ear and breathes out in satisfaction.

Not long after that, Kian's black wolf walks up to me and gently nuzzles his head towards mine. Just like with Miliano, I don't react, which allows him to lie down on my other side, with his head right next to mine. He licks me in the face with his tongue; it's the ultimate gesture of intimacy.

He shows my wolf and me that he loves us. I give him a little lick back on his snout to show that I'm not mad before putting my head back on my paws. We lie there all three together and enjoy nature around us, like in an eternal bliss.

That doesn't last for long, though. A threatful growl comes from behind us, and I immediately stand up in front of my mates to protect them from danger. The wolf before me is big but not bigger than me; the smell of rot and decay surrounds the air-this is a rogue.

It shows its teeth against us and growls uncontrollably. I growl back and take a step towards him; he immediately sits down like a little dog with his head down in submission. Miliano and Kian guards the young wolf while I walk behind a tree and shift.

I put on the long T-shirt that one of my boys had with them before walking back to the wolf. I stand in front of him with my arms crossed and give him a stern look.

"Shift," I say, calm but stern voice; he glares at me, which annoys me—I breathe in deeply before I use my alpha voice. "SHIFT!"

He shifts in seconds before me.

"How-how did you do that?" the rogue asks.

"You have no right to question anything I do, especially when you're in my territory. Now, who are you?"

"I don't have to answer to some girl," he snorts at me; with a sugary smile, I turn to my mates.

"Babies, go and shift, I'll be fine," I say, and they both give me wolfie smiles before walking away. "I give you one more chance before I'm going to get angry. Answer my damn question."