My Best Friends' Younger Brother

| 31 | 𝙼𝚒𝚖𝚒

____one year later + a couple of months____

I hit the tennis ball harshly at the wall, watching it bounce back at me. I dodge it this time as I look over at my phone.

My lips tighten together as I see it will be a year in a few minutes.

My parents said they'd give me Travis' number to contact again after a year. My silly self never memorized it, and that forever haunts me that they held that over my head for my final high school year.

All I could focus on...was him. That place I was in when I first came here...I'm not like that any longer. I refuse to speak on those dark times where I really...really needed him; and I couldn't have him.

I've been too focused on tennis and friends to distract myself from the pain... I needed something to distract me or I'd crumble there. I wasn't suctioning as a human, but as a robot. When I played basketball it only hurt more.

Came to realize that tennis is an easy sport if you imagine people as the tennis balls - it works!

"You look really stressed."

I look over my shoulder, seeing Hai pass me back the ball. I take it as I just place it in the basket.

"I wouldn't say stressed, more...nervous..." I glance over at her and she raises her eyebrow. "I d-don't think I ever t-told you. I have that sp-special person in the US, you know...the one-."

"The one you played basketball with? Yes, if I remember correctly." She snickers at me because I know she thinks I'm lying. I have no proof of his existence besides Rosie and the shoes and the ring...but that's all materialistic!

I can say anyone bought those things for me and no one could say different. They weren't there with Travis and me. They didn't feel what I felt or experience what I experienced or love how I loved... That wasn't taken for granted at all and to know that first day here that it was taken from me had me shutting down...

The pictures and his love aren't things I can get back. They were undoubtedly taken from me unfairly, but I'm going to get them back!

"I'm not l-lying." I tell her adamantly as she bounced the ball a bit. "I k-know the truth so that's a-all that matters."

"Yes, that is true; but wasn't it you that said you're happy your parents sent you here? That you've changed into a better person because of this experience?" She questions me and I fall still. "This 'special person' never came up."

"I couldn't t-talk about him before w-without crying, that's why... But my p-parents sending me here w-was good. I was able to meet you, the team, the college, get excellent grades for Senior year, and I'm a st-stronger person now. Why wouldn't I b-be at least a l-little thankful? The only thing I d-despise about this is me being torn from him." I stated matter-of-factly. "I feel kind of b-bad because I did better and grew f-from this. I'm not sure how he did."

"Well, were you guys close? Did he have his own issues that would hinder him?" She questions me curiously without even realizing that he did.

"I wouldn't c-call them problems...more like j-just traumatic experiences that h-have caused issues in his l-love life." I mumble quietly as I see her raise her eyebrow. "Knowing him, h-he wouldn't let that hold h-him back. It didn't b-before, it was just h-harder for him to fall in love-."

"Wait, why are you speaking about love? Does he mean something to you in that way?" She asks me curiously, her eyes beginning to brim with excitement.

I don't think my friends here know I'm in a relationship with a man, but an African American man. You don't see a lot of black people here - or at all! If we do they're usually mixed from interracial relationships or college, but that's still not a lot.