Qa'id Mutalaq ✓

Thirty Three

Play Belki and Turanim

I suggest to keep some tissue by your side because your eyes are going to shed Niagara falls instead of tears..
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"Father," I held his hand in mine, looking at his unconscious state, unable to control my tears. "I am sorry," I choked on my tears, "I misunderstood you. Mother told me everything, father. You don't have to worry. I have always loved and respected you no matter what you did," I held his hand against my cheek. "I am still your little girl, Baba. I am still your little Yazia. You still are my Superman, Baba. I still need your love and affection. I need your prayers, Baba. Please get well soon. I can't see my Superman like this. It breaks me too, Baba," I cried, looking at his pale face.

"Do you know how much I've craved for the warmth of your hug, Baba?" I placed my head on the edge of the bed. "My life has been really tough, Baba. I want to talk to you about it, Baba. How I was bullied and how I wasn't able to stand up for myself. How cowardly I was. I used to think that my Superman will come to save me," I muttered. "When we were in Turkey, our relatives used to taunt us. They used to push us away. We were low. We were poor. You pressured me so I wouldn't have to face the problems that you had to. Your hard work made me the person I am today," I wiped my tears, looking at him.

"I will not be able to have a baby, Father. I will never be able to be a mother," I sobbed. "I have always wanted a normal family, Baba. A loving husband and sweet children. I hated that our family was never normal. You and mother always fought. I and Ifra never got together," I sniffed. "Now that I have gotten someone who loves me and cherishes me. I am the bad person now. I will ruin his life, Baba. I will never be able to give him children. I want to punish myself by setting him up with other women. I want to break my heart into millions of pieces. I want myself to die. I have never been good enough," I cried, placing my face in my palms. "I have never been good enough to make a person stay. I have never been good enough to make you stay. I have never been good enough to make my friends stay, and I know Yoongi will also leave me. I know I am rude. I am cold and I am dramatic. I am hard to handle. I know that's why you distanced me from yourself," my tears refused to stop. "If anything happens to you, Baba. I will never forgive myself. I will never be the same, Baba. I can never be like a warrior that you raised me to be," I sobbed loudly.

"I just want a moment with you, Baba. When you hug me and tell me how proud you are of me. A loving word from you will be enough, and even if you don't say anything, I would say. I would say that all these years I have yearned for fatherly love. All these years I have always loved you and looked at you like my Superman," I whispered loud enough for him to hear. "Baba, if you hear me, then please don't blame yourself. You had done nothing but good. You made me a strong and independent woman, and I am so thankful to you for that. Even though you had been a little harsh, but isn't it pressure that turns coal into diamond?" I smiled at him.

"I love you, Baba. Please wake up. Do this favor for me, Baba," I held his hand tightly.

The machines in the room started beeping loudly. As I saw my dad getting worse, my heart pounded with fear. "Junaid, please call Dr. Ferman right away," I pleaded, my voice trembling as I pressed the button by the bed.

"I can't lose you, dad. I am not allowing you to leave me," I whispered, my eyes welling up with tears as I looked at him lying there.

Moments later, Dr. Ferman stormed into the room, his expression grave. "We need to get him to the OR immediately," he instructed, his voice commanding as he assessed the situation.

"Stay here, Yazia," Ferman Sir held my arm, but I couldn't bear the thought of leaving my dad's side. "I'm not leaving him alone, Dr. Ferman," I roared, determined to stay by his side every step of the way.