FATALISTIC LOVE ✓

XXII

I remember many details about our car ride together.

you looked so comfortable being in your livid car. your attire matching the colour of it. your big hands on the steering wheel, driving smoothly yet quickly down the rain splattered roads. you took off your coat- mentioning to me that you got too hot whilst driving. I smiled politely at you and gulped later when I saw the veins in your bare arms.

I remember how your voice sounded as you tried to talk to me, initiating a receptive conversation. your soothing voice, your noisy laugh, your chuckles along with the rain hitting against the windows- made me feel relaxed. I hate that I still remember your voice after all this time, that it still rings in my ears whenever I think of you for a brief second, how it's the last thing I think of before falling asleep. why do I still remember you?

"do you like the rain?"

I was surprised at your question. "yeah I guess. it sounds nice and can be refreshing."

"me too." you smiled a close lipped smile that made my insides turn. you stopped at the traffic lights and turned your attention towards me- your eyes on me.

"why do you keep avoiding me?"

"what? I don't."

then it was silence for a while. but for some reason you found the atmosphere around us amusing and I was bewildered.

"what? what's so funny?"

I asked because you started to laugh as you drove the car.

"nothing." you let out a lovely laugh. "I wish you'd just give me a chance." and before I knew it, we were parked outside of my house.

I looked at you, biting the inside of my mouth- anxiety in my chest as I forced myself to speak. you were making me step out of my comfort zone which was a first. "maybe I will." I whispered.

"really oh my gosh-"

"don't get your hopes up!"

I opened the car door but your hand on my wrist stopped me. "come here, there's something in your hair." your voice was very quiet.

you took something out of my hair as I looked at you, my eyes whisking over your sharp features. our faces were so close as you focused on the thing in my hair.

I could see every aspect of your beauty up close and it had me falling hard for you you you. your pointed nose, the shadow reflecting on your face along with the street lamp- highlighting your sleek skin and mischievous eyes.

and your long fingers curled my hair, tucking it behind my ear. the pads of your fingers being felt against the edge of my cheek as you smiled a small lip smile.

and you kissed me.

on my temple.

I unintentionally closed my eyes for a few seconds. I gave you a smile that made you smile back at me before leaving your car.