b o n u s - t h r e e

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year: 2024
jessie: 23 years old
billie: 22 years old

a/n parts from doc will be in italics so it's not confusing :)

b i l l i e

"i'm nervous," i told jj. "i kinda don't wanna watch it."

"you've got to watch it," she chuckled. "but i've gotta admit, i'm nervous too."

today, i'm finally able to watch a rough cut of the documentary. i'm nervous as fuck.

"wait, ew, i have to see clips of me at nineteen." i said after a moment.

"the fuck you mean ew?" jj's eyes widened.

"i hate watching old videos of me." i defended.

i let out a sigh, cuddling to her side as we sat on the couch. "are you ready?" i asked as my thumb hovered over the play button.

"ready when you are." she nodded. i took a deep breath before pressing play.

the opening scene was of me singing ocean eyes. then it was video that i had took of me listening to ocean eyes on the radio for the first time.

"oh my god, that was forever ago," jj gasped. "you were so cute." she gushed.

"were?" i teased.

she pulled me further into her side. "you still are cute. i'm just saying that that video is especially cute."

after that scene, it cut to me running up to greet a bunch of fans outside a venue in salt lake city. i let out a small sigh as i realized that it was during mine and jj's break.

we watched intently, jj softly humming along to 'bored' as i performed it.

we continued watching, me desperately hoping it didn't show too much about our break. lucky for me, it only showed one scene relating to it.

"madre," i called out. "could you braid my hair for the meet and greet?"

it showed mom nodding and gesturing for me to sit on the floor in front of the couch.

"how are you feeling, billie?" she asked as she braided through my hair.

"sad." i answered.

"do you wanna talk about it?"

"not really." i mumbled, picking at my nails.

"that's fine. just know that i'm here for you when or if you do wanna talk about it." she told me softly.

"i know, momma."

it then zoomed onto my phone as i watched my live wallpaper of me and jj. after i had watched it, i had gently threw my phone across the room, and you could hear it hit the floor with a small thud.

"i know it's been years, but i really am sorry about that whole situation." jessie mumbled, looking down at her lap.

"hey, it's cool, bubba," i assured. "we've already talked about it several times. i promise it's okay. i forgave you a long time ago."

she let out a small sigh. "yeah, but i haven't forgiven myself."

i paused the doc, turning to face her. i took both of her hands in mine. "listen; things like that happen, alright? we got through it, didn't we? it's all good. you don't have to stress about it anymore, baby."

"you promise it's okay?"

"i promise." i nodded, holding my pinky out to her.

she gave a small smile as she linked her pinky with mine.

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