Persphyni : I am Destruction

66

"This facility won't run itself." I stared at the map as a plan began to come in my head.

"We'll need to prioritize doctors and engineers." Abby confirmed my own thoughts.

"All right." Bellamy's deep voice answered as he looked across the table at me.

"Of course we go for Raven." I nodded already having her rescue mission planned.

"You call this justice?" I kept my eyes on the map of the bunker as I clenched the metal table under my hands.

"I call this, making things right. Thanks to my brother." Octavia's voice was threatening as she stood beside me.

"You let this happen? How many of us have to die?" Jaha didn't waste a second.

"You're lucky it's not all of you."

"Lucky?"

"Indra." I gave her a glance and she nodded in understanding. The words that were going to leave her didn't as I turned around to face Jaha.

"You have 110 spots as I was able to adjust a few things. All the other clans have chosen their survivors. It's your turn to do the same. Children are first priority. Gideon and Lyla among them. You'll need Molly as a chef and gardener down here. She helped run food on the Ark. That's three spots taken care of." I informed him before returning back to the map on the table. Ignoring the blood on my hands I've accumulated in such a short amount of time.

"Obviously the six of you in here are apart of that list. Emori and Murphy as well. Then Raven, Monty, Harper, and Miller. That's fifteen. The rest is up to you."

"A hundred. We have over four times that."

"A pain that all clans feel." Octavia spat out as I set a hand on her fist.

"Is this what you wanted?" Jaha whispered and I knew he was looking at Clarke.

"No one wanted this."

"Enough. It's not want. It's what is right." I looked up and stared at the back wall as I addressed the man behind me and the blonde beside me. "You took the easy way. The cheater's way. The cowards' way. You let these people make their beds, and now someone else will lie in them. So no, this isn't fair. Not to them. Not for them." I turned as I stared down the ex-chancellor.

"This isn't the Ark. This is earth, and you should be sent into Praimfaya for your selfishness." I turned to glance at Clarke. "If either of you truly cared about our people, you wouldn't have locked them in. Now you are the bad guys who rule over them unjustly and play them like dolls. Octavia and I won the Conclave. You should have waited. Let me be the bad guy, but now. Now this is on you. Both of you." I hissed, my calm demeanor escaping at the last sentence.

"The death wave comes in 24 hours. You have 12 to decide." Octavia spoke up and walked out of the room. Needing to get out of there before she exploded. Indra following as I stood at the table.

"When you're ready, I'll gather Skaikru." I informed as I moved away from the table and out the door. My feet carrying me up as my cloak billowed behind me. Grounders bowing their heads as I walked passed. My head nodding in acknowledgement as I reached the top of the ramp and grabbed ahold of the metal railing.

"Lincoln. How did you fight for peace when all there is and ever will be, is war?" I whispered as I stared down below. My body wanting to curl into itself as I stood tall and confident for the watchful eyes that glanced my way.

Twelve hours. And then it would be over. I'm getting Raven and making it back here before the death wave. Then I'm leaving, for good.

Planning your death isn't something many people can say they've done or are doing. It's stressful to say the least. There's a part of you that wants to live while the other part is happy knowing this life is over. The suffering the pain, the emotions, the trauma. Done.

I wonder what it would be like if I hadn't changed. Blood would certainly still accompany me, but would it be my own or others'. I'd like to think that I've become a version of myself I was always meant to be.

And all this thinking and debating and contemplating helps no one. Not even me as it does nothing to ease my mind. All it does is make me want to know the answer or at least dream up scenarios. And on the other hand, it makes me want to stop thinking. There's never a win-win, it's always a give and take.

You put sweat and blood and tears into something and your hard work will be rewarded. Even if your hard work was training to become a killer.

My thoughts were captured by the sound of doors shutting. My eyes making contact with my father as he gave me a melancholy nod.

"Wonkru!" My voice traveled into the room below. Silence taking over as they turned to face me. "It is time Skaikru makes their decision. Do not be aggressive without means. If I find anyone hurt, nothing will save you." The grounders who understood English nodded and began to walk out bring their friends with them while I translated my previous statement for those who needed to hear it in their native tongue.

It was all but ten minutes when the grounders had done exactly what I had asked. The heavy metal doors closing down at the floor below. My hands still gripping tightly to the railing as I saw the large crowd of people who spiraled up onto the ramp.

"Jaha. What's happening?" I looked at the man who spoke, my eyes softening as I saw the toddler in his arms. The kid didn't ask for this. Neither did we when our ancestors created the bombs. Protection for them— unthinkable hell for us.

How cruel the world does work.

As the Arkadians banged on the doors to be let out I saw Jaha whispering angrily at Clarke, seeing that it was my chance to step in before any of them got a new idea.

The sharp fire of a pistol echoed as another shot rang out following the first.

"Settle down." My voice carried over the wave of people as I took in all their gazes. "I know you are scared, I know you are worried. You have every right to be. But I need you to look at your neighbor and tell them to be strong. Then tell yourself. Jaha will explain what is happening, as he is the one that put you in this mess. But for now, please hang tight." I slid my gun back into my holster before floating down the ramp. My cloak behind me like a cape as I made my way towards the office where the five decision makers had disappeared to.

"No one's saying it's going to be easy, but we need to make the people listen to reason." I quietly opened the door and skipped inside as my dad finished talking.

"Someone still needs to get Raven. I'd like to volunteer."