Her eyes

Chapter 59

It had been about a month since Layla and I became official. During that time we drove about an hour with Kimberly to make it to the last days of Winter Wonderland in London. I had won them each a big fat plushie, Layla had placed the grey elephant in Kimberly's room she had named him Mr. Fatty. Sometimes when I got home from the gym she would be taking naps with him.

Kimberly was similarly obsessed with her Mr. Teddy, each day I spent with Layla was a new experience of falling deeper in love with her. She kept going to her sessions with Linda each week. And after the first three times of me going with her, she became comfortable enough to go see alone. After that I would drop her off and then I would wait in the car or in the lobby with fresh flowers or her favorite ice cream.

After a sunny winter day, darkness had descended and after a long day spent in class Layla and I were watching a show. She was resting her head on my chest and I was fingering her curls. "Does winter ever end here?" I asked, tired of the perpetual rain and frigid weather.

"We're in England baby. It's a miracle that seasonal depression hasn't hit you." She replied absentmindedly.

I stiffened slightly at her response, "has it hit you?" I asked cautiously.

"Not this year, no," she said her focus still on the flat screen.

I relaxed, "Good, I'm glad." I kissed her head. "You'll tell me if it does, right? Or any type of feelings you might struggle with." I asked

"Yeah, but I think I'll always carry some sadness with me. No matter if I'm happy at the moment. Which is a contradiction in itself really," she replied causally.

"The good thing is that I've always known where these feelings stem from. You know, with not really having a real family I guess that comes a sense of grief. But the me before you, never felt like she belonged anywhere. I didn't have a place in the world, no one would miss me if something happened. I think I'll always have to carry that little ball of heartache nestled deep between my ribs."

Sh continued, "Linda says that it might not ever go away, and the best thing I can do is to try and live with it. To find healthy coping mechanisms, I think that you're mine. Like a happy pill of sorts."

I nudged her head with my fingers so that she would look at me, "Im your family now and so are Kimberly and mom and dad."

"I will always do my best to make that little ball grow as small as possible, to make it turn from flame to a spark that eventually dies out. You have my word. I think it's a given that you feel that way, with everything that's happened in your past."

"But I also think in time when you create more good memories that outweigh the bad ones, that little kernel will eventually have nothing else to grab ahold of and feed on." I replied.

She nodded a wet sheen on her eyes, she gave me a watery smile. "I think so too, Archer" she said as she kissed me deeply, climbing into my lap.

I kissed her back with as much vigor as I could hoping the kiss would convey all that I was feeling for her. Our tongues tangled and she whimpered against me, moving her hips in a way that made my groin stir to life. I pulled back before I could do anything that we might regret later on.

"I want you, Archer." She breathed, her eyes filled with desire.

"Are you sure?" I asked. "I don't mind waiting for you, however long it takes."

She shook her head, "I don't want to wait." She placed little kisses against my neck that made me almost take her on the couch.

"Let's go upstairs." I said standing up with her legs around my waist.

What a sight she was, her hair was a curly halo around her, her eyes dripping in desire, her lips wet and rosy from our kisses and the slight blush that covered her cheekbones made me almost combust on the spot.

I hurried upstairs as she continued placing kisses on my neck working me into a frenzy. I didn't want this to be over quickly, I wanted to taste every part of her and have her on the brink of insanity before giving her what she really wanted.

When we made it to the bedroom I laid her down on the bed, her hair falling onto the pillows like a payed actress. "Are you sure you want this, you know that we can stop at anytime right?"

"I want it. I want you so bad." She breathed.

I kissed her again but slower this time, and then I kissed her cheeks, her nose and continued covering her whole face in kisses. And then I moved down to her neck feeling where her scent was strongest, and kissing my way down. I placed my hands under the sweatshirt she was wearing, feeling the soft skin of her stomach.

"Archer," she whimpered, and then she took my hands and guided them along with the shirt up. I got the hint and pulled the sweatshirt off. She wasn't wearing anything underneath and when I first saw her topless, and the shape of her beautiful breasts her nipples dark, my heart stuttered.

I suddenly felt like an inexperienced boy again, seeing a woman's body for the first time. I'd had a few sexual relations, but none of them could top this moment, with her. She laid back down and when I hadn't said anything she covered herself with her arms.

I swallowed hard, "you're the most remarkable woman I've ever seen." I said and kissed her again, she opened up to me like a flower in bloom, enveloping my neck in her arms.

I kissed my way down her body,  over the valley of her breasts, and payed each one the greeting they deserved. All while the sounds and the ragged breaths she took played like a symphony in my ear. "Tell me what you want?" I asked as I moved further down.

"I-I don't know, anything everything," she breathed her hands reaching for my hair, I placed my thumbs in her shorts and pulled them down along with her panties. I kissed each of her hip bones before backing up to take in the sight of her laying naked in my bed.

When I looked down something caught my eye, the white scars that covered the tops of her thighs, all the way up to her hips. She sat up and turned off the overhead lights from the control panel on the headboard. We were suddenly immersed in darkness.

"Kiss me, Archer." She said softly after a while, her voice strained. She reached for me in the dark and I took a hold of her hands stopping them at my chest.

"Who did that to you?" I asked my voice low and shaky.