3 - Tigers

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You thanked the teacher and walked into class with a happy grin on your smol face.

"Oh hey y/n! did that durtbag of a teacher tell you off?" Himiko said with a odd smile. "ill dispose of her if you'd like. Anything for you." you giggled cutely, and patted her on the head.

"Nono bootiful human, its fine! She actually told us that we are all off the hook, for now at least. Let's keep our humor to a minimum, k?" You said, holding up your index finger to your mouth.  Himiko giggled, then grasped one of her hands around one of yours, then said;

"c'mon y/n, lets go sit together and mimic other people!" Himiko said, with a cheecky smile.

"k!" you replied, as your new best friend dragged you to a table.

-/-Time skip after school-/-

After the bell rung, your mom came and picked you up from school. Since you and your brother are thankfully in different grades, with him being 8 years old he's a 1st year in primary school, he wont be able to tattle to mom about you getting in trouble.

"Hi my babies, how was school?" your mother asked, crouching down.

"Quite uneventful." You said with a smile, but thinking;

'well mother, I made a bestfriend, killed my teacher, hung out with Satin, and then found out I'm a grim reaper. But oh suprise! it was a false alarm on the teacher thing!'

"I had a great time mom! I met a lot of new friends!" your brother said with a smile. His bootiful teeth shone through his lips.

'Too...bright.....my retina are gunna be scarred from this light.' You thought, covering your eyeballs with your forearm. Your mom gave you a light hit on the head. You and your family made their way to the car, then left.  When you got home,  you ran right to your room.

The room was medium sized, with a twin sized bed, with a closet and purple desk. One the walls, there were pretty fairy lights and a wall full of pictures. Your favorite one was when you went on a family fishing trip. You plopped on your bed, clearly bored. You didn't feel like playing super heroes, or dress up, or surprising your mum so she'll piss herself. So, you were officially bored. You decided to hang with your new homie, Lucifer. 

You stood up, and activated your quirk. The room twisted in a spiral kind of way, only for a second.

'Dafuq is happening I'm sure I'm not on drugs' you thought.

You then you warped to hell. It was just as you left it, but Lucifer wasn't there. You walked over to his throne, and looked around. But he wasent there.  You then decided to call out to him.

"YO, U RED TWINKY-DINKY LOOKIN ASS BitCH!" You called out, into the abyss of hell.

'Hmm, I wonder where he is, maybe he's sleeping, or-'

"Hey y/n!!! wassup dudette?" he said holding out his hand, while crouching down.

"Nothin much boss-man, lookin nice!" you said, giving him a highfive. He looked suprised for some reason. Then he gave a nice smirk.

"Ya know, you are different. All my other helpers where so distant at first, but you're a blunt bitch!" Lucifer said with a thumbs up. Y/n was a daredevil at heart, you always loved adventure, drama, and taking risks.

"Welp thats cuz you seem intresting.  I mean come on, who gets the oppertunity to hang with the frikin devil himself! At first I thought you where gunna be a mean-stubborn assewhipe, but you are just and misunderstod fellow memer." You say, dramatically clenching your smol fist.

"So true." he said, copying your fist action.

"So anyways, where were you?" You asked. "I got here like two frikin minutes ago, and I was lookin for ya."

"Oh I had some government issues, angels are heavenly, but they are devils on the court lemme tell ya. Their like damn vultures." Lucifer mumbles the last part. You tilted your head in confusion.

"On the court? Did you sue anybody?" You asked, tugging on his black sleeve.

"Weeellll, kinda. You see, my last little helper, Darryl, interfered with the winged ass biotches work, so he got killed." He said, secretly stuffing down his laugh. He wouldn't admit that Darryl deserved it. "A person that messed with me was deemed fucking 'innocent' and Darryl was punished." He said all that with a resting bitch face. Then he looked down to see you, giggling at his choice of words.

"Dayum poor dumb-dumb bubblegum ass bitch." You said, shaking your smol head. "Like, WhAt tHe fUcK RiChArD." Hearing you say that made Lucifer cry bootiful tears of joy.

"Aww, you are just like a mini female human version of me!" he squeels. Then he takes a glance at his high-tech watch. "hmm, my afternoon is free until my court meeting, so we can just chill until then- OMG LETS DO A TOUR!" he grasped your hand, then dragged you elsewhere.

Author-san here! I DO NOT MEAN TO OFFEND ANYONE READING THIS. ALL RELIGIONS ARE EQUALLY GREAT AND I DONT MEAN ANY HARM. 𝗽𝗹𝘇 𝗱𝗼𝗻 𝘀𝘂𝗲 𝗺𝗲𝗵 I luv u allll

"First up, the nine circles!" Lucifer said, coming to a stop. they where in a room full of doors, each labeled a number 1-9. "Depending on how bad a person acted in life, they go to one of these nine doors. As said in certain scriptures, if ya don't believe in my good friend up there, then you'll end up here." He walked you over to the first door.

"You would end up here in this door if you commit a smol crime like stealing." he then walked to the ninth door. "You would end up here if you committed a series of murders, abuse, or anything very terrible." He then walked to the middle. "Depending on how evil you lived your life, like on a scale of one to nine, you could end up on any of these doors. What happens in them is not for you to hear though~" he finished. You were curious, but didn't admit it.

He continues showing you around hell, all the important places, until it was time for his debate. and that got you thinking.

"Hey Lucifer, what do ya get if you win the argument? Also, what happens if you loose?" You ask him, looking upwards. He flinches at the subject, then decides to answer.

"If I loose I am restricted from natural disasters for 1 year, and if I win, which I probably will..." he pauses. "We'll get the privilege to have cats down here!" He squeals in excitement. You give him a; 'really, that's it?' glare, cocking an eyebrow.

"I honestly thought that you would wanted tigers or something." he looked at you like you said you just recited an urban dictionary.

"THATS THE BEST IDEA EVERRRRRRRRRR! TIGERS COUNT AS CATS RIGHT? RIGHT. OMG WHAT ABOUT AN ALBINO TIGER." Lucifer continued to rant on about how he is going to fill the place with albino tigers. You giggle, then remember that you needed to water your Venus fly trap named Louise. She was the only plant that you had.

"I gotta go Lucifer, see you later!" You waved goodbye, then saluted. He gladly returned the gesture.

You teleported back to your room, and yeeted yourself on your bed. You crawled over to a drawer, and opened it. Louise's flies where in there. You took a big one, and yeetd it towards Louise. She caught it with ease.

"Nothing but plant." You say smugly, then you plop down onto your bed and cross your legs.

'I feel so peaceful...a little too peaceful.'

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