Chapter 3: My Dying Rage. (Part 2)

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"I wish you all the best on your journey," the Queen bowed her head. "May the Goddess bless you and know our hearts follow where ever you may go."

A shaking breath escaped my lungs forcing myself to sit before I fell. My chest felt empty and my mind numb yet the urge to kill the two guards just a few metres away refused to fade. I held up my hands in front of me. They were trembling. My vision blurred and blood covered my skin. I had used these hands to kill four people over and over again to the point I had mastered it like a practised dance. Right now they were alive again. Two standing at attention between me and the Hero, two more closer beside them.

If the Hero hadn't looked at me the way she did. If like the others she had tried to kill me... how many more times would I have died? It felt like I had been barely spared from becoming a killing machine, a cold hearted one at that. I clenched my fist against my chest and recalled my memories of home. The people of Axel and their cheerful faces. The kindness they showed me and the lessons they taught. If they had learnt what I just did... I doubt they could look at me the same.

I stood up just as the Hero and her party made their way to me. Like before they placed their bags and headed to the carriage.

Unconsciously I reached out, "Excuse me."

The Hero turned to face me, "Yes?"

To be honest I was relieved by the way she looked at me. It was normal. Not indifferent like the others nor was it bounding with care. My death had reset everything, however this time I was thankful.

"Hello?" she said and waved her hand.

I blinked, "Uh sorry. I just wanted to greet the Hero. I'll be looking after you during the journey so please rely on me." For once I bowed while meaning it.

"Oh...," she was caught off guard by my earnest behaviour and began to fumble with her hands. "Umm thank you... and please call me Lara."

I nodded and took her bags to the carriage. As I did so I began to realise where I had gone wrong all my previous lives. The Hero and her party, they were chatting friendlily. Even Earnest and Taylor were smiling. The entire time I had kept them at arm's length as they did with me and in the end when I needed them to trust me they couldn't. They didn't believe the Monster existed and Ronalt was adamant I was a traitor. If I were in their shoes I'd think of me the same. So this time... this time I'd really try.

"Careful with that one," the voice came from Ardent. "The tools inside are very valuable."

"Of course. I'll keep it safe," I smiled to him and placed it gently down into the carriage. "I have some training as an apothecary myself. They can be quite delicate."

Ardent beamed towards me, "Ah yes her majesty did say something of the sort. Tell me, what kind of training?"

"From potions to heal and harm to everyday medicines. My teacher was very thorough."

"This is a first for me to talk to an apothecary not attached to a guild," Ardent came closer. "The subject has always interested me. Though my learning is in a different field, I'd love to talk with you some time."

I nodded, "Well we have a long journey ahead so I'm sure we'll get the chance."

A loud grunt came from behind Ardent. Ronalt had his arms folded.

He stared directly at me, "We need to depart soon. Have the bags packed quickly so we can be on our way."

"Apologies sir," I lowered my head. My anger at him hadn't entirely vanished as I thought.

"My fault," Ardent laughed. Ronalt turned back around. "Sorry about him, he can be quite stiff but he means well. Ah before I forget, we haven't been properly introduced. My name is Ardent Val Tour, Wizard of the Magicians Guild."

"Rain Axel, of Axel," I shook his hand. "Let's get along."

*

After a few hours of driving the carriage I decided to take a detour and parked on top the nearby hill. With a light tap I knocked on the carriage door. The door opened and Ronalt's stern face appeared,

"What is it? Why did we stop so soon?" He was stiff as usual.

"For the view sir," I gestured behind me where the Kingdom's Capital laid out along the plains.

"You stopped to have a look at the city?" he looked at me with an incredulous rising anger.

I took a step back, "With all due respect Sir, I was told that this is the Hero's first time leaving the city. I thought perhaps she would like to admire the view and grow to love the Kingdom like I have."

His expression loosened. As I thought, put in a bit of patriotism and the Hero in the argument and suddenly he was much keener to do business. I could use this for later. Without admitting defeat he stepped out of the carriage and made way for the others to disembark. When the Hero saw the view it really did make it all worth it. Her eyes glowed with a curious and amazed light, coupled with her smile, my heart couldn't keep still.

"This is... this is- it's beautiful," she stepped towards the cliff as if getting even an inch closer would make the view all the better.

Ardent smiled, "It has been a long time since I have seen the city from such a high place."

Marley was unexpectedly passive and just nodded, "It is nice but the Goddess' temple had the same view. I'd much rather be inside the city and take my time exploring the ground."

"Oh isn't this quite the sight," a surprised admiration came from just beside the carriage. Earnest stood with his back leaned against the door. The most astonishing thing to me right now was the fact he actually decided to step out.

"This is the crown jewel of the Kingdom," Ronalt smiled. It was a soft nostalgic smile that showed the care he held inside. I had to change my mind, Earnest moving was one thing but I had never seen Ronalt smile like that before. So he could be human after all. Though to be honest the view was very nice to look at. From here the hustle and the bustle of the city faded away and the artistic architecture could truly be appreciated. The streets that drew across the earth highlighting major intersections and carving paths to the major interests. In between it all were the walls protecting the outer and inner city. They stood high overlooking the landscape but not forebodingly and instead offered a sense of protection. Then to top it all off was the palace placed near the Capital's centre visible from almost all parts of the city, standing as a beautiful beacon of the Kingdom.

Someone nudged me in the side. I turned to see Taylor invading my personal space like usual.

"Taking us all up here, what are you planning?" she teased but there was a serious undertone in her voice. "Are you trying to make me swoon?"

"Not at all," I replied honestly. "This is simply one of my favourite views and I thought I'd share it with the Hero before she left."

"Well aren't you a sweetheart," she laughed and backed away, apparently okay with my answer. To be honest it was that and to also win points with the Hero and her party. The closer we became by death day, the more likely they would believe my words.

After a few minutes taking in the view Ronalt reminded everyone we had a plan to stick to and ushered everyone into the carriage. Before the Hero entered however she popped up beside me where I sat in the driver's seat.

"Umm Rain was it?" she looked at me almost shyly.

"Yes?" I replied feeling strangely cautious.

Instead she smiled, "Thank you. I really enjoyed the sight."

"N-no problem." My face was starting to heat up. Thankfully she disappeared from my sight before anyone could notice. 

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