I'm who I wanna be

Chapter 15 - So you're single?

      I sit up, looking around in confusion. What happened? Ah yes, I was at the club. Nevin gorged himself on food I have no idea where he got his hands on and a bit too much booze in my opinion, ending up throwing up in the bathroom, Lance also drank some cocktails until he felt sick, Hale tried to pick up a few girls without any satisfactory result for him, as they thought him too young and harmless because of the curls, and Zayden disappeared most of the evening. The only unclear thing is how I got back and why I forgot the most important part, because I remember the rest of the night too well, although I wouldn't necessarily want to. It wasn't a bad experience, I think in life you have to try all kinds of things to be fully satisfied. So, I wouldn't mind repeating the experience, but I need a break from the blinding lights and loud music blasting my eardrums. And definitely a break from Zayden, I would say.

      I take a closer look at the room, noticing that Nevin and Hale are sleeping, and Zayden is closing his suitcase, noiselessly. He notices me and motions for me to shut up, and I comply, not that I had any intention of starting to scream. Under such circumstances I would have woken up Hale who would most likely have made a scandal of proportions, being as angry as he was yesterday when he was not asleep anyway. I glance briefly at the blond and then at the curly boy to make sure neither of their sleep was disturbed by the sound I made when I moved a little. I push the blanket aside, getting out of bed as quietly as I can. Zayden raises his eyebrows, as if wondering what I was thinking. Honestly, I don't know either.

      I check my phone, staring longer than necessary at its display that shows eleven o'clock. Another day without breakfast, it seems. It's already becoming a habit, although I don't skip this meal on purpose. I bet that one kilogram lost is only due to the lack of breakfast in my diet.

      I'm not surprised to see that I'm dressed in the same clothes as yesterday, and I couldn't be happier than that. The thought of one of the boys undressing me doesn't make me smile. I doubt that Nevin would dare, but I was afraid of the others. Especially of Zayden, who I think is the most capable of such a gesture, although he didn't necessarily give me the impression that he would be disrespectful or a pervert.

      I want to get out of here, especially so I can go to my room to shower and change. I feel extremely dirty in these clothes, especially since I've been wearing them for about fourteen hours. Not to forget brushing my teeth, a routine without which I am ashamed to open my mouth in the morning. It's like a kind of obsession, even though it's totally innocent. Thanks to Zayden I now have a key, but the way to get it wasn't exactly the best I guess, but I shouldn't care. Maybe this way my attraction to him will disappear. As long as I remain a rational person, all these gestures that put Zayden in a bad light should help shape my opinion of him, which will lead to less and less attraction.

      Zayden flops down on his bed and puts his hands over his face, trying to block out the light that crept through the blinds as I scrambled out of bed. I approach him, quietly and with my hands crossed over my chest, waiting for him to mobilize because he is my only chance to leave this room without Nevin's redundant comments. I'm getting bored sitting like that, because good few minutes go by, and Zayden doesn't even move. I sit on the edge of the nearest bed, which is his, facing him. Zayden moves a hand, looking at me with one eye.