Forever And Ever

50. Grayson

I hold Emery's tired body in my arms.

"I love you," she whispers into my chest.

"I love you, too, pretty girl," I massage her neck. "So much."

"Can I keep you for the rest of my life?" She peeks up at me.

"You can keep me for as long as you want, baby," I kiss her forehead. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, you know that?"

She pulls the blanket higher over us and cuddles closer to me.

"You're the love of my life," she murmurs sleepily. "I won't ever stop loving you and I know that there's nobody in the world who I would rather love."

I tighten my grip on her. I've loved this girl for my whole life, and I know I'll never stop.

I can feel Emery's breaths even out and I know she's fallen asleep.

I tuck my face into her neck and let myself drift off to sleep.

I hear Emery's door open and it wakes me up.

I turn and see Aria standing in the doorway.

"Hey," she says quietly. "We got pizza, you guys want some?"

"Can you bring some in?" I ask softly. "I think she's going to be hungry when she wakes up."

"Yeah, sure," she walks out and shuts the door quietly.

The door opens again and she walks in carrying two plates of pizza.

Emery stirs and blinks up at me.

"Hey, baby," I murmur, kissing her nose.

"Hi," she smiles sleepily.

Fuck, she's so pretty.

I hear the door open and see Aria trying to slip out quietly.

"Thanks, Aria," I call after her.

She nods and walks out.

"Are you hungry, pretty girl?" I tuck her hair behind her ear and she nods slowly.

I reach over and grab one of the plates, handing it to her.

"Are you going to eat?" She looks up at me, confused.

"Mhm," I murmur, grabbing the other plate.

"Can I ask you something?" She whispers.

"Anything," I kiss her head.

"Why did you used to have panic attacks?" She breathes.

"How long have you wanted to ask me that for?" I smile at her.

"Since Devyn told me you used to have them," she grins.

"I used to get them a lot after my mom left," I run my fingers through her hair. "I had really bad abandonment issues for a while. Every time my dad would leave or even when Devyn left sometimes, I would freak out and give myself a panic attack. They got so bad I had to start taking medication for them."

"I'm sorry for asking," she murmurs. "And I'm sorry you had one because of me. I feel bad that you haven't had one in years and then I gave—"

"Don't be sorry. First of all, I like that I can be honest with you. I know you, and I know that you'll always be understanding. And it's not at all your fault that I had one. What happened was one hundred percent my fault," she opens her mouth to argue and I press my finger to her lips. "I don't want you to feel bad or like it's your fault, because it's not. I thought I had fucked up so bad that I had lost all my relationships with the people I love. I broke up with you and nearly gave myself a panic attack right there because I absolutely hated the fact that I hurt you. And that I lost you and it was my fucking choice. And then, I couldn't even look at my best friend after that because I was so pissed off at him. I didn't even know if I wanted to still talk to him after that. I lost my best friend and the love of my life at the same fucking time. I had been on the verge of a panic attack since the minute Devyn told me to choose. And then I came back and saw that I had messed up your relationship with Devyn, too, and I completely lost my shit."