Great expectations (1)

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Scene: Dunphy household

Phil : Fix that step. Morning.

Claire : I'm still sleeping.

Phil : Happy anniversary.

Claire : And they said we wouldn't last.

Phil : Who said that?

Claire : Oh, look at you. You're cute.

Phil : Go ahead. Open it.

Claire : What have you done?

Phil : Nothing. Something, nothing.

Claire : It's a View- Master.

Phil : Look inside.

Claire : Oh, it's us. Look at how young we are. Oh, God, that
perm.

Phil : Yeah, it really framed my face.

Claire : Why is there a picture of a bracelet?

Phil : Must be some kind of a mistake.

Claire : What the heck is that? Oh, Phil, you didn't.

Phil : What? Did he? Did he?

Claire : It's beautiful. Oh, sweetie, I love it. Okay, your turn.

Phil : My turn? Where is it?

Claire : It's on the bureau.

Phil : I'm surprised I didn't see it. Where?

Claire : There, the red envelope.

Phil : It's a... card.

Claire : That's where you're wrong.

Phil : I am so excited. Coupons for... five... free... hugs.

Claire : You don't like it?

Phil : Are you kidding me? I love it. It's so creative. Coupons for
hugs, which are usually free, but this makes it official, which is so
great.

Claire : I was so proud of myself when I thought of it because
you're impossible to buy for. You never want anything.

(Commentary)

Phil : Things I want... Robot dog, night-vision goggles, bug
vacuum, GPS watch, speakers that look like rocks. I love my wife,
but she sucks at giving gifts. I'm sorry for the pay-channel
language, but... Yogurt maker. I can't not think of things I want.

(Cut the scene)

Scene: Pritchett household

Gloria : Of course we would love to have the baby, all the other
cousins are sleeping over tonight.

Jay : The more, the merrier.

Gloria : See you tonight. Bye-bye.

Manny : Is Haley still coming?

Jay : You're related. I will spray you with the hose.

(Commentary)

Jay : All the grandkids are coming over for "Jay's night." Family
tradition. Everybody wears PJ's, which they love. I make my
famous Sloppy Jays, which are really Sloppy Joes, but made by
Jay, which they love. And then we watch a western together,
which they don't care for, but, hey, it's "Jay's night."

(Cut the scene)

Scene: Dunphy household

Me: Hi mom. Hi dad. Happy anniversary to you two.

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