ZOYA

Chapter 61

Zoya's POV

Who ever said walking away is the hardest thing sure was right. Im walking away from my family. My steps are bold filled with confidence but each step that I'm taking I feel my heart cracking. I'm whimpering in pain but I have my head held up high and I'm not turning back. Through the window I see their reflection.

Look at Archie  ,  he's standing their shocked and I faintly see his hands shaking. I took one big breathe and walked out of the hospital.

I got into a taxi  and gave him the address to my apartment. Yes. I do have I personal apartment. Sometimes when I want to just lay down and relax without anyone else I come there. Its a pretty big place but yes noone knows about it.

I get there and tell the taxi driver to wait while I go get money for the drive.

I used my fingerprint sensor to open the door and I got to my bed room grabbing a 100 dollar  note and going back to him.

"Ma'am I don't have change for this" he said. "It's okay , keep it." I said and he looked at me shocked. I just forced myself to smile at him and he just nodded. "Thank you ma'am. Have a goodnight" he said and I nodded and went back to my apartment.

I really needed a break to get my head straight to I book a ticket  to Thailand. I knew noone would disturb me there and there was  less Mafia drama there as well.

I began packing my clothes in a suitcase  not being sure of how long I'd be staying I took clothes for every occasion I could think of.

I decided to take a shower because my plane was leaving in 4hours.

I got out of the shower and wore some black jeans white tank top and brown leather jacket. I was about to a dagger in my boot but remembered  that there wasn't any use of it now.

I threw the dagger across the room and decided to finish off packing. Just then my head snapped up. That dagger it didn't even make any noise of landing.

"What the fuck" I said as I turned around and saw Dillan holding a drink in his hand and the dagger in the other one.

"I really was expecting you to turn around just after you threw this dagger." He said while admiring the gold carvings  on it.

"And you thought I'd just let you walk away?" He asked looking at me curiously. I just folded my arms across my chest and looked the other way. "Speak to me Zoya" he said.

"You know, somethings are just better left unsaid." I said and he chuckled lowly. "You use that statement  everytime when you don't want to talk to anyone and in most cases me" he said.

He stood up from his seat and walked towards me. He grabbed my elbows and pulled  me close to him but I just kept on looking away. "These past few days have been nothing but absolute hell for me. I made the worst decision I could ever make. I took steps I wasn't supposed to. I spoke about things I never thought I'd say. And worst part all this ended up  with me breaking your heart. And you literally  don't know how disgusted  I feel right now." He said.

"Zoya I know I can't ever justify what I did that day. And I never will. But trust me when I say this. I was only thinking of you. I was soo clouded with your thoughts. Your laugh , your sweet pout , your voice, your  love , everything Zoya and the more I thought about it the angrier  I became because I didn't know how you were or where you were.

Just thinking about you gave me chills and the day Essence  showed her face to me. I just thought about her as you. I  was seeing you when I did whatever I did with her. Even her moans , it all sounded just like you.

I only realised  what big of a mistake I'd committed  the next morning. I'm really  sorry Zoya , please  baby. I'm so sorry" he said again.

I just looked at his eyes and my heart broke. How could I have been this selfish. I just let my emotions  get in the way that I didn't even take it upon myself to.let him explain.  But still  I can't be apart  of this. I can't keep on doing things for them the moment they apologize. No it's over and I'm done. I don't want to ever look back.

"Dillan" I said as I put my hand on his chest. "I understand but please. I really need to go" I said and his facial expression  hardened.

"Just say you don't love me and I'll let you walk away freely." He said. I looked away from him and he grabbed my Jaw making me face him. "Look me in the eye and tell me that you don't love me Zoya. I promise I'll never interfere in your life ever again." I said.

"Dillan please don't do that" I said trying to free myself from his hold. I might be a bad ass out there but when it came to him I always found myself powerless at his mercy.

"Say it Zoya" he said looking intensely into my eyes.

"Dillan-" Gosh that came out as whispered barely audible.

"I-" I was struggling with my own words. I closed my eyes and tears escaped from them.

I felt his thumbs wiping  my tears away.  Opening my eyes his face was a few inches away from mine.

"I love you" he said before  slowly connecting our lips.

Somehow I don't  know how I found my hands in his hair melting into the kiss.

He sucked on my bottom lip as he's hand traveled to my ass and he gave it a squeeze  earning a gasp from me. He swiftly entered  his tongue into my mouth and our tongues danced together.

He removed my leather jacked at placed me on the bed. He then removed his suit jacket  and shirt while looking at me like his life depended  on it.

Getting on top of me he kissed my neck and I now for a fact he left mark there for sure.

He started fighting  with the buttons on my jeans and I chuckled.

"Why are you so dressed" he grumbled as he dealt away with the last button and pulled them off me and then removed his trousers and my top. I was left in my underwear and he just had him boxers. He started kissing my stomach and a moan escaped from my mouth  as he went on to caress my inner  thighs. He came back to my face slowly and looked intensely  at me that I found myself drowning in his look.

"Just say it amor." He said as he leaned in. "Dillan" I whispered as he placed kissed on my shoulders and neck. "Tell me my love"  he said as he continued  kissing me.

"I-i I love you " I said and everything just stopped. It wasn't the first time I was saying this but after all the tension and problems that were surrounding us it all felt like it was the very first time.

I looked at me and smiled  before smashing his lips on mine. I tried to keep up but he was doing it too hungrily that I almost ran out of breathe. He pulled out and rested his forehead on mine. "I missed you all too much my love. Now tell me.? Where were we" he said with a smirk plastered on his face like his everyday thing.

He's hand traveled to the hem of my panties and before he could make any move my phone vibrated which was on the night stand.

"Fucking hell" cursed Dillan as he looked at it. He grabbed it and looked at the screen. "It's James?" He said and passed it over to me.

"Hie James" I said trying to sound as casually as I could. "Zoya-" the next words he said completely  made me freeze and I looked up at Dillan who was still on top of me.

"Dillan , she's hurt" I whispered unsure of myself anymore.