Love is Suicidal [Completed]

chapter: fifty five

Remind me of you by Kid LAROI^

"Jesse?" Naomi looks at me with worry in her eyes. "What's wrong?"

I look at her then over at Eli as he had his arm around her shoulder, watching me also. I look around the bar at the people standing around the dance floor, dancing or talking to other people.

Looking back at them, I knew they were waiting on an answer. I smiled, but it was forced and I hoped they didn't pick it up. "Nothing?" I picked up my drink then held it up. "Cheers."

Naomi looks at me a little longer before grabbing her drink and holding it up, along with Eli. I smiled as we all took a sip and I felt the alcohol slither down my throat as it was leaving a burning sensation.

I saw Eli watching me the whole time as I sat the sat down then made a face before looking around the bar again.

When I ordered a drink, Naomi and Eli both were caught off guard. I knew that they were asking, in their heads, why I was ordering alcohol when I don't drink but it was honestly the only thing that was helping me.

Ever since earlier.

Ever since I saw River.

My mind was in daze ever since and Naomi noticed but didn't ask me about it. She saw the way I was acting when we were all coming over here to El Placer but she never said anything.

But when we walked through the door, I glanced up at the counter in such a quick motion. In fear that I'd make eye contact with her but she wasn't here.

"So, why did you decide to sit on that side?" Naomi asks. "You usually sit over here."

Eli looks at me as I glance at him then look back at Naomi. "Wanted to switch it up a little. I stare at the same bar counter every time, so now I get to-" I look at the back and noticed that it was plain and there was just a wall. "stare at the wall." I smiled afterwards.

They both look at me with a weird expression before turning their attention to something else.

I was stirring my drink around until someone came to take our order. I watch as Eli and Naomi ordered then I was last, which I ordered some hot wings cause I was craving them so bad tonight.

After she walked away, I look towards them as they were talking about something and slightly laughing. I couldn't help but smile as I kept stirring my drink around then realized I had to pee.

"I'll be back." I said as I stood up from the booth.

Looking around, I walked across the dance floor towards the bathroom, hoping nobody was in there. I hate when there's a public bathroom and it's crowded with people when I'm trying to do my business.

I walked in and sighed out a relief when I saw that nobody else was here. I went into one of the stalls and did my business before walking out and standing in front of the sinks.

I washed my hands then stared at myself in the mirror, looking at my face at different angles under I heard the door to the bathroom open and I quickly looked down at my hands.

Looking back up, I saw a woman walk to a stall then I dried my hands before throwing the paper towel away. I walked out of the bathroom, trying to make my way back to the booth but it was hard when all I wanted to do was glance over at the counter.

Once glance can't hurt.

Right?

As I was walking, I quickly glanced over and wished I never did.