Love is Suicidal [Completed]

chapter: sixty three

Love is poison by Ollie^

I walked into El Placer with Eli and Naomi on my arms. My eyes immediately looked towards the counter as soon as we walked in, waiting to see River but I didn't see her anywhere.

We walked to a booth then sat down. I got my usual spot which has perfect view of the bar and I glanced over there to look for her but didn't see her.

When someone came to take our drinks, I got my regular water as Naomi and Eli got some alcohol. I smiled at them when the woman walked away before folding my arms on the table.

"I'm surprised y'all aren't drunks yet." I chuckle.

Naomi shrugs then looks over at Eli as he had his arm around her shoulder. "I know my limit. I don't drink to get drunk."

Eli nods. "Same. My parents never did like drinking, so I don't drink much."

"I remember when dad whooped your ass cause he found out you had some beer." I laugh as he shook his head. "That was funny and I wish I had it on video."

Naomi looks over at Eli. "I want to see some baby photos and videos."

"No you don't."

"Yes I do." She chuckles. "Please? We can have a family night, looking at all your baby photos."

I saw Eli shake his head while Naomi was begging him. I could see the redness in his cheeks as he was looking away from her, trying to avoid the conversation as much as he could.

"Jesse," Naomi looks at me. "back me up."

I look at Eli as he was giving me a look and I smiled over at Naomi. "I do know where the photos are and there is some videos on the laptop. Plus, mom always wanted to show his photos off."

"That's it. We're going. I'm making a date with your family." Naomi said then smiled at him.

Eli looks at me for a moment. "Thanks."

"You're welcome." I smile.

Looking away from them, I saw River walk from the back door from behind the counter. I saw her walk over to someone who was sitting down, talking to them before turning towards the alcohol.

Earlier today just didn't seem like it was even real.

The things she said and everything else. It seemed like it wasn't reality and I dreamed the whole thing.

When I came home, I had to process everything. It took me a while to actually grasp what happened at her house and it was hard to come to terms with it cause I waited so long for her to say all that.

But when she told me she loved me..

A part of me screamed while a part of me was silent.

I could hear something in her voice when she said that. I heard a slight shake, which meant she was scared to admitting it. I knew the reason why she was afraid, so I didn't call her out on it.

Hearing her tell me that was amazing and I couldn't help but feel everyting inside my chest burst. But at the same time, I was scared and I didn't really believe what she was saying. I'm not sure why but it seemed like everything was make-believe.

I've been crushing on this woman for over three months. Since the day I seen her, I knew that I couldn't stop thinking about her. I knew there was something about her that was pulling me in, but also pushing me away at the same time.

I came to believe that my gut instinct wasn't lying but that didn't make me stay away for very long.

Watching her, I really wanted to go up there to talk to her or be near her. I look towards Naomi and Eli before scooting out of the booth and catching their attention. "I'll be back. Going to go grab something. Order for me."