What Was Left At Camp

Chapter 40. Explain

"What's the matter, Baby?" Williams morning voice snapped me out of my thoughts.

In his arms, my head laying against his chest I learned back to meet his emerald green eyes. "Say that again?" I requested, a smile forming as I spoke.

"I asked what was the matter. Are you ok?"

"Not that. What you called me. Say it again." I sat up in the bed we shared in his hotel room; not breaking eye contact with him.

William let out a small laugh, more like a huffed type giggle. "What? Baby?"

I shook my head in approval and leant down placing a soft slow but simple kiss on his sweet full lips. "I like how that sounds." I kissed him once more. "Remember the 'rules'?"

"Ahhhh. Yes. No nicknames." William grabbed me by my waist and pulled me down on my back as he jumped up to hover over me. "Thank god those days are behind us! Wouldn't you say, Love? Baby. Babe. Honey. Handso-"

I pushed him off me with my hands to his chest and he fell to my side. "Don't ruin it, punk!" I teased back. "But yes, I am glad those days are behind us." I turned on my side to face him taking in the beauty that is MY boyfriend.

His hair was a mess with some strands falling into his eyes. Instinctively, my hand reached out to gently push the astray locks from his face. He grabbed my wrist as I did and kissed the back of my hand. He began placing subtle kisses down my arm pulling me closer to him with each kiss. The thoughts running through my mind moments earlier became visible in my eyes once more. William, never breaking eye contact with me, noticed the sadness in my eyes. He stopped with the kisses and pulled me into his warm embrace. "What's wrong, Baby? Please, something is up. Talk to me."

I hated that he knew me so well. He has always been able to read me so easily. One good thing about our non-relationship-relationship break was that I got over the spell being around him put me in. My mind no longer became mush just being in his presence. Don't get me wrong, he still had an effect on me like no other but it wouldn't be good to be in a long term relationship with someone that made it difficult to focus. And so, finally, after all this time, I was able to read him as well as he reads me. And right now, his eyes told me if I didn't spill what was bothering me, he wouldn't stop pestering me about it.

I dramatically exhaled while sitting up, removing myself from the warmth of his arms. "This." His pupils dilated at the word and a look of worry took residence on his face. "No, no." I was quick to backpedal. "I didn't me this, as in us." I covered my face with my hands in embarrassment. "I dnt wt t nert wuk up w-out eww" I mumbled into my hands.

William laughed and gently pulled my hands out of my face. "One more time so I can actually hear what you're saying please?" He smiled at me and his eyes glistened.

Ok, so he may not make my mind turn to mush anymore with just one look but I can't not give into their pleading ways. "Your going to think I'm being stupid but... I don't want to give this up. Waking up with you everyday and coming home with you, or to you each night. I guess I got so used to you being around the last few months of school and then I missed you so much this summer." I paused and looked down into my lap. "Waking up this morning with you. It may be the best part of my day and you know I don't like mornings." I faked a laugh. "I don't want to give it up."

William stayed silent. A deafening silence that was killing me inside. I looked up from my lap to find his eyes still on me. His face showed no emotion but his eyes looked deep in thought. Conflicted thoughts... hmm.

"W-William? Love?" I whispered softly, fearing what he might say.

He took a deep breath in and out and his shoulders dropped. "You have school. You'll be moving into your dorm soon. You're excited, no?" I couldn't decipher what his voice carried. He didn't sound sad or happy. Indifferent, maybe?