A Reluctant Mate

Cora's POV (49)

Side story. (3)

"His back, his back" .... "do you think I should tell him how I feel?" .... "No, what if I scare him away" .... "but if I don't tell him, then he will never know how I feel" 'stop talking to yourself, just go and tell him' my talking to myself has annoyed Pepper, my Lycan, 'I'm scared he will say no' 'then we move on' 'no Pepper, I really like Dixson, I don't want anyone else, only him', "Cora, I'm going to play hide and seek with alpha Mitch, I'm going to show Lucy all the best hiding spots" "okay Grover, I will be out in just a minute" "are you thinking about Dixson?" "No I'm not, go out and play" "yes you are, you're going red, I'm going to tell him" he laughed as he ran out my room, "Grover don't, get back here you little shit".

I ran out after him but Grover had a good head start, he got to Dixson and the little Lycan next to him, Lucy, his new daughter, Grover spoke to Dixson for a few seconds, grabbed Lucy's hand and they went off running towards Mitch.

When I finally got to Dixson, I was out of breath and desperate to know what Grover told him, "deep breaths" he laughed as he put his hand on my arm to steady me "what, did, Grover, say, to, you?" I was still out of breath as I spoke, "that he was going to play hide and seek with everyone and for Lucy to go with him, was he meant to tell me something else?" "No, no, nothing, how did the meeting go?" I said relieved that the little shit didn't say anything to him, "yeah, it went well, do you want to sit down on the blanket with me?" "Yes please, I need a rest after chasing Grover" "why were you chasing him?" "He was just being silly in my room, so I chased him so I could tickle him to death".

We sat down on the blanket and watch the pups play with Mitch, Dixson was talking about Lucy when he was in that hell hole, he looked happy talking about her, he had a the softest smile on his face, something I've never seen him do, I've seen him smile but it looked off, like it was forced, this one looked genuine.

Lucy came running over to us and fell into Dixson's lap, "did you see? We won, alpha Mitch couldn't find us" "I told you, I knew all the best hiding spots" "I'm cold" Lucy said snuggling into him, he wrapped his arms around her and said "I told you it's too cold for a dress" Grover took his jacket off saying, "here, I'm really hot, I don't need it" "that's very kind of you Grover" Dixson said taking the jacket.

She put Grover's jacket on and they went off running to go play again, "she fits in nicely" "she is amazing, she can make friends anywhere" "are you both going to stay here or go back to your sister's pack?" I asked, I really wanted to pour my heart out to this Lycan but I'm too afraid of being rejected, "I think we will stay here for now, my sister has enough on her plate with the pups, she don't need my issues to burden her, I need to figure them out on my own" "I can help you, you know I'm here for you" I said looking down at my hands "I don't want to trouble anyone else with my issues" "you can't keep it all bottles up inside, you need to talk to someone, I could be that someone" "I don't want to talk to you about all this shit that's going on in my head, it's like a minefield in there, please just treat me the same as normal, your the only one that treats me like a normal Lycan" he said as he rested his head on my shoulder.

I could feel my face getting redder and my heart beating faster, 'I love you Dixson, please let me help you so I can tell you how I feel' 'tell him' 'Pepper, I can't, not yet, can't you see his struggling to keep it together, I don't want to push him away, I can wait until he is ready to hear my confession'.

Dixson had his head on my shoulder for what felt like hours but was more like five minutes, he only moved it away when Lucy came running over again, excited, Grover not far behind, 'so did you tell him?' Grover mind linked with me, I just shook my head, 'one day you will be able to tell him, please don't be sad, it makes me sad' 'don't be sad for me, I will be fine' Grover and I looked over act Dixson and Lucy, they looked happy, 'he might look happy but I bet he's still has nightmares about what happened to him, I don't want to add to his worries of me confessing to him'.

'I could tell him if you want?' 'No, please don't, like you said, one day I will be able to tell him', "come on Grover, they are starting again and we are it this time" "Lucy, no cheating" Dixson said tapping his nose, "ok I won't" she said running off with Grover, "Lucy's sense off smell is pinpoint accurate, even though I had been out of my old pack house for months, she could still track me down, it must have been hard on her, walking all that way, alone" he quickly wiped a tear away before I could see it, but I did, "maybe with her finally being with you, you could heal your mind and you never know, you might find a mate" "that won't happen, I'm never going to put myself in that position again, I will never have another mate", my heart broke, there and then, even if I told him how I feel, he won't accept it, "I will be back in a minute" I said getting up, not wanting to look at him, "sure".

I was in the floods of tears before I got to the pack house door, I run up the stairs as fast as I could and slammed my door, "I'm so stupid, how could I not see that he doesn't want me, and he never will" 'you don't know that, he might change his mind when you tell him' Pepper tried to comfort me, 'you heard what he said, he will never have a mate again'.

I rummaged in my wardrobe to find the bottles of alcohol I hid from Grover.

I drank until I passed out.

(MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE)