Dark Secrets

Chapter 42:

I followed Harry up and realized that we were going to my grandfather's office. I stopped walking when I could see the Griffin statue a few yards in front of me. Harry turned around and looked at me.

"Are you alright?" Harry asked.

I shook my head. "I can't go in there. I-I watched him die in there. I'm not ready." I took a few steps back.

"It's alright, Jen. I was there too but we need to see these memories. They will explain why Snape killed him. Don't you want to know? Maybe it'll help you get closure."

"I-I don't know. I don't think I'll be able to bear it." I looked down at my feet.

Harry rested his hands on my shoulders and forced me to look up at him. "You can do this. I'll be with you every step of the way."

I swallowed. I need to think that this will explain everything. This will help me get closure. I just need to relax. Dumbledore would want me to see this. I nodded and let Harry lead me to the Griffin statue. Walking up these stairs my memories flashed to the time I walked with Draco up these stairs, about to tell my grandfather that someone had tried to rape me. I shivered at the memory. All the times I had walked up these stairs last year it had turned into something bad, I just pray it won't happen again. Maybe something good will come out of this visit. Harry opened the door to Dumbledore's office and we walked in. Harry walked over to the far left corner of the room where I could see my grandfather's Pensieve.

Harry poured Snape's memories into the Pensieve, and, taking my hand in his, together they entered the basin. I found myself in a playground. A young, small boy, whom I recognized as Snape, was watching two girls, Petunia and Lily Evans, from behind a small bush. After Lily shows some strange tricks to her older sister, unaware she is performing magic, Snape emerges and informs Lily that she is a witch and derides Petunia as a Muggle. Insulted at being called a witch, Lily follows her indignant sister away, leaving Snape bitterly disappointed. It is apparent he was planning this for a while and it didn't go the way he wanted it to.

The scene dissolved and reformed into a new one: Snape telling Lily about Hogwarts and magic, including Azkaban and the Dementors. When Lily inquired about Snape's parents, he said that they are still arguing, revealing Snape's unhappy home life. When Petunia appeared and insulted Snape, a tree branch above broke and fell on her. Accusing Snape of breaking the branch, Lily goes away, leaving him miserable and confused. The scene reformed again into a different memory. Snape was standing on Platform Nine and Three Quarters next to a thin, sour-looking woman whom I recognized as Snape's mother. Snape was staring at Lily's family. Petunia and Lily were arguing: Petunia called Lily a freak for being a witch, and Lily retorted that Petunia had not thought so when she wrote to Professor Dumbledore, asking for admission to attend Hogwarts. An embarrassed Petunia, realized that Lily and Snape went through her room and read her letter. She insulted them and they parted on bad terms.

The scene reformed once more, and inside the Hogwarts Express, Snape finds a compartment with Lily and two boys. She was upset over her sister's hurtful words. Snape began to say that she is only a Muggle but instead grandly announced that they finally were going off to Hogwarts. When he mentions she had better be in Slytherin, one of the boys, the young James Potter, scornfully remarks to his friend, Sirius Black, that he would rather leave than be in Slytherin, and preferred Gryffindor. Snape engaged in an argument with Sirius and James, until an indignant Lily asked Snape to follow her to a different compartment. The scene dissolved again into the Hogwarts' Great Hall during the House sorting ceremony. Lily was sorted into Gryffindor, much to Snape's dismay. Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew, and James Potter are also sorted into Gryffindor, joining Sirius Black. Finally, Snape is sorted into Slytherin. At the Slytherin table, he receives a pat on the back from a Prefect, Draco's father.