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AN: Try reading this while listening to whatever piece of music I put above. It helps with the mood :)

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"Gigi!" Yoongi couldn't help but laugh as his Isabella giggled as tried to push his hands from her waist. She hated being tickled, but he loved the sounds that she made when he pressed his fingers gently into her sides.

"St-Stop it, Gigi, I can't breathe!" She laughed, her beautiful voice echoing through the music room.

Yoongi moved his hands from her sides to around her waist, holding he close as he pressed a kiss to her pink lips.

"You're so mean," She pouted, a smile playing on her lips. He knew she wasn't mad at him. She never got mad at him. She was always so patient and calm. She never shouted at him, even if he was being annoying.

"But you love it," He sighed as she leaned into him, "And I love the sounds you make, it's even better than music,"

Isabella smiled and looked up at him, "Your laugh is nicer, I sound like a hyena," She said.

"A pretty hyena," Yoongi joked, laughing as she smacked his arm lightly. He pulled her back in and she wrapped her arms around his body, "But in all honesty, Izzy," He said softly, "Without your laugh, there would be no music in my life,"

---

Yoongi woke up with a start when he felt a kick on his foot.. The bottle of whiskey was still in his hand, and Daisys sketchbook was open on his coffee table, right where he left it.

He sat up with a groan, running his fingers through his hair. There was a lot more of the amber juice left in the bottle than he'd expected, so he took a quick swig, before screwing the cap back on and sitting up.

"You're joking," Hoseok sighed, "You're still drinking?"

Yoongi shrugged, "You didn't message me last night,"

Despite the irritation bubbling in his gut, Hoseok smiled and sank onto the sofa next to Yoongi.

"My meeting went well,"

"You're getting promoted?" Yoongi asked, rubbing at his eyes, "Great. Congratulations,"

"No, Yoongz," Hoseok sighed, "Bee let me take her for dinner. We aren't together again, but it's a start,"

"I thought she was with Jimin?" Yoongi stretched and reached for his mostly empty packet of cigarettes from the table. He tapped one free and lit it, making Hoseok roll his eyes with disgust and get up.

"At least smoke that in the kitchen with the window open, Yoongi. If you want to ruin your lungs, then fine, but don't ruin my lungs as well,"

Yoongi followed Hoseok to the kitchen and flopped down onto the wooden chair at his tiny table. His friend pushed the window open, and flicked the coffee maker on, before also taking a seat. There was silence between them as Yoongi waited for him to answer his previous question.

"She wasn't with him," Hoseok said, "That was just a rumour from some of his fans. He would never go out with her, he's our friend,"

"He did like her," Yoongi pointed out, taking a deep pull on his cigarette, "I wouldn't be surprised if they-"

"They didn't," Hoseok said firmly, "I believe her when she says they didn't," Yoongi shrugged and Hoseok got back to his feet to make coffee, "Talking of Jimin," He said, "I saw that drawing of him on your coffee table. It's amazing, it looks just like him,"

Yoongi grunted, "Daisy drew it,"

Hoseok almost dropped his mug in shock, "Daisy?!" He exclaimed, "But she- that picture was drawn with such passion,"

Yoongi nodded, "Yeah. She drew it in your lecture,"

Hoseok grinned, "I see, I see. You found her passion,"

Glaring at his noisy friend, Yoongi took another drag on his cigarette and reached for his coffee. He took a sip and wiped his mouth, before stamping out the cigarette in the overflowing ash tray on the wooden surface of the table.

"Without passion, there is no music," He said quietly, getting to his feet, "Without music, there is no passion,"

Hoseok looked up at him sadly, "And without Isabella, you have no passion," He said softly, "But Yoongi, Isabella is gone. She's been gone for two years. You can't keep doing this to yourself. She'd hate it,"

Yoongi shrugged, "She'd forgive me," He placed his mug on the table, "I should shower,"

"Yoong-"

"Enough, Hoseok," He sighed, cutting him off, "Stop talking about her. It's too painful,"

Before Hoseok could speak, Yoongi had already left the room. With a sigh, he began his Saturday routine of cleaning Yoongis house.

Yoongi stripped out of his clothes and stepped under the hot running water. He closed his eyes and just let himself feel each blast of water from the shower head. His friend was right; Isabella would hate seeing him like this. But how was he supposed to feel joy without her? How was he supposed to feel passion, and laugh again, when he couldn't hear her laugh or feel her body in his arms? 

He knew it was unhealthy, what he was doing, but he just missed her so much. Every single thing reminded him of her, and he both hated and loved it.

He curled his fingers into fists as he remembered the sound of her laugh, and how it made him so happy. He remembered the feel of her fingers on his skin, and her lips upon his. He remembered how looking into her eyes felt, and the joy and peace on her face when she watched him play the piano.

He remembered the moment that he first saw her, and how beautiful she looked on their wedding day. He could see her face as their bodies moved together as one during the night, and he remembered how she had begged him to play for her one last time.

He remembered it all, and he couldn't stop his chest from heaving, tears mingling with the hot water from the shower head above him. He was choking on the water, unable to breathe properly as he began to sob, and he crouched down; wrapping his arms around his knees and tucking his head down as his body shook with the cries that gradually got louder and louder until he was screaming into the air and water around him.

"Shit, Yoongz," He barely heard Hoseoks voice, and he didn't even notice that the water had been turned off. Hoseok placed a large towel over him and climbed in the shower behind him, wrapping his arms around his wet body as he trembled and gasped for air, not able to stop his emotions from pouring out.

"It's alright, Yoongi. I'm here, just let it out, buddy. I'm here,"

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AN: Not edited, as usual

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