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"I've got a hundred million reasons to walk away but, baby, I just need one good one to stay"
* * *
The keys shook in Bella's hands as she unlocked to door to her apartment. They felt like 500 pounds in her hand. She unlocked the door, it opening with a loud creak. She inched her way inside and kept her head down as she took off her coat, hanging it up with her mouth frozen in a frown. The pitch black of the apartment surrounded her, swallowing her up like a starving monster. Her eyes flickered over to see faint lights coming from the dining room. With her eyebrows furrowed, Bella made her way towards them.
She walked into the dining room to see the table covered with bright candles, two plates of dinner towards the end of the table. Owen stood next to the table in a sharp suit and a warm smile. He held a red peony in his hands, Bella's favorite flower.
Bella's breathing slowed, her mind racing with confusion and surprise. She hadn't seen or heard from Owen in days, and here he was, making a romantic gesture. It reminded her of when they had first started dating, when Owen was kinder and made Bella smile. It was before he relied on alcohol to feel better.
"I made pasta, your favorite," Owen said. "It's not going to be as good as when you make it, but I tried."
Bella stared straight ahead at him in complete disbelief. She tried to form words but couldn't, her mind was racing with endless thoughts. She forgot how to act and how to speak, was she supposed to feel angry or relieved? She opened her mouth to say something but still couldn't, she didn't know what to say.
"I know," Owen continued. "This was all pretty spontaneous but I wanted to do something special since you're very special to me. You deserve this after...everything that happened."
Bella bit the inside of her cheek, "Owen, I don't know what to say."
Owen stepped closer to her, "Then don't say anything, just listen to me. I don't know what's wrong with me but I do know that I'm sorry. I want to fix what I broke and I want to apologize for how I've been acting. I know that these are just words but I truly hope that you can forgive me."
Bella's brain felt like it was on fire. Both her heart and her brain were saying two different things and she didn't know which one to listen to. Her entire world was in flames and she didn't know how to put them out.
"I'm so sorry," Owen said. "I can't say it enough, sweet Bella."
Owen handed Bella the red peony, her small hand holding it tightly. He smiled down at her and put his hand against her cheek, Bella flinching in return. His hand was cold against her burning skin, it was like putting an ice cube on a warm stovetop.
"I'm glad you like it," he smiled. "Bella, I'm truly sorry about everything. I never want you to leave me."
Bella sucked in a breath, "You've hurt me a lot and in many ways. I don't know how much more I can take, I miss the old you."
"Then I'll change and I'll become a better version of myself. I want to be with you for the rest of my life."
The bowls of pasta on the table slowly started to become colder by the minute. Bella looked down at the peony and smelled it, glad that it was real. The room was stuffy and dry as all of the windows were closed and locked.
"Dinner is getting cold," Bella breathed.
Owen grinned, "Then let's sit down."
He held the chair out for her as she sat down slowly, the pasta in front of her smothered in a thick red sauce. She bit into it and immediately agreed the her version was better. It didn't matter, she was starving after her long drive and didn't feel like cooking. Owen slurped the pasta with no hesitation, obviously thinking he did a great job cooking.
"Where did you go?" Bella asked.
"I was at a friend's house," Owen answered, wiping his mouth. "Where did you go?"
Bella cleared her throat, "I was at home, mom isn't doing so well."
"Oh no, is she ok?"
"She-she's fine."
Bella didn't have the energy to get into full detail about her mom, she didn't feel like causing the mood to feel any lower. She didn't want sympathy or anyone to feel bad for her right now, she just wanted to focus on trying to finish the bowl of pasta in front of her. That could be the biggest challenge she's had in a while.
Owen shifted next to Bella and put his fork down, pushing the bowl of pasta away from him. Her turned to her and cleared his throat before grabbing her hand and holding it gently. Bella down at their hands and up into his icy eyes. He took in a large breath and reached into his pocket.
"Bella Snow," he began. "I never want us to have to go through this again, I want us to be together forever. I want a small house and a family with you. I want it all."
Owen slowly pulled out a velvet box and opened it, revealing a beautiful diamond ring. Bella gasped and stared at it in disbelief. Owen grinned and got down on one knee in front of her, Bella suddenly forgetting how to breathe.
"Will you marry me?" Owen asked.
"Owen," Bella managed to get out. "This is...INSANE! I'm 19 and we're both so busy!"
"I want a future with you, Bella. I can't imagine myself without you, will you please become my wife? We'll make it work."
"Owen, listen to yourself!"
"I was offered a job in California and I'm going to take it, we will move there and find you a teaching job. No one will judge us and we'll go to the beach everyday. Please, I need you to be mine."
Bella held her breath and stared at the ring. She tried to imagine herself as Owen's wife, she almost tried to imagine herself living a life in Quantico. It pained her to think about moving to California and leaving her job, but there were so many other opportunities out there. She would be married and could have children, something she has desired her entire life.
It upset Bella that she didn't see this coming, she longed to have more time to prepare herself for this. But in front of her knelt Owen who was hungry for an answer immediately. She didn't even know if she forgave him completely yet. Everything he was promising her sounded perfect and she didn't want to regret turning it down.
With a shaky breath, Bella reached out and stroked Owen's cheek. She grinned softly as her body filled itself with nerves. She hoped that she was making the right decision.
