Alice in Borderland

Chapter 80

Despite the fact that the sun's rays in my face bother me, I open my eyes relaxed. I recognize how the sun is slowly approaching its peak, which is why I assume it is about shortly after ten o'clock. The blue sky causes me to close my eyes again and snuggle back into my pillow. But when I notice that my pillow is rising and falling in regular cycles, I instantly freeze. It's nothing new for me to wake up on Chishiya, but my spongy brain is reviewing yesterday's events.

Actually, yesterday I had planned to go to my room together with Chishiya. But he just silently said that I had been drinking and that he didn't think it was a good idea. Maybe it was better that way, but still I feel bad. Possibly even guilty, but without him I wouldn't have eaten and my impulse control would have suspended a lot more clearly. But instead of just sending me to my bed, we went up to the roof and watched the sunrise, at which point I must have fallen asleep.

I straighten up and sweep my hair back before looking at my hands. They are still shaking uncontrollably, but significantly less than yesterday. Simultaneously annoyed and relieved, I let myself fall onto my back and snuggle lightly against Chishiya again. If he were awake, he'd probably think it unnecessary or dismiss it as typical girly behavior. I can remember exactly how he stiffened when we first hugged.

Still, I don't care and bury my face back into the fabric of the white vest. Balanced, I exhale and close my eyes again. When I'm near him, everything that's been going on the last few days shuts off.

"Are you going to go back to sleep or are you going to wake up now?"

Hiding my grin, I hide my face even more in his chest and my muscles instantly relax. Inwardly, I roll my eyes, but I only press my grin more into the white fabric of his vest.

"Keep sleeping," I reply shortly, but immediately stiffen to the thought he might think it's still the aftermath of the alcohol. "But we can also get a coffee from the restaurant first and then sneak up to my room".

A barely noticeable tremor tells me he's laughing slightly. I lift my head to look at it with my own eyes and a warm feeling envelops my chest. He returns my gaze and even from this angle, still lying on the floor, he looks perfect.

"Agreed, I'll get the coffee and you go ahead".

I sit up and he does the same. My gaze swivels to his back and my eyebrows inevitably draw together. Single pebbles of the texture of the ground have drilled into his back, and even as they fall away I recognize dark marks on the otherwise flawless fabric.

"I'm sorry," I murmur, though he hears it anyway. Even though the marks don't look painful, it can't be pleasant to fall asleep like that. Chishiya shrugs it off with a short laugh, and from his stern look I can tell he's suppressing another eye roll.

"Huh? Never mind," he says dryly, but then his gaze softens and he almost pierces me with his eyes, "You were talking in your sleep."

Hell no. I can't remember what I was dreaming. Ann has already informed me that I talk in my sleep every now and then, my cheeks turn reddish. Why am I acting like this? Did I dream something salacious or something along those lines. This is so embarrassing.

"What did I say?", I say meekly, bobbing my leg impatiently. Please don't.

"You whispered a few words. Just your uncle's name and 'Please don't,'" he says emotionlessly, and my whole body tenses. Suddenly I know exactly what I was dreaming and that it wasn't a normal dream. It was a memory.

"Meet me in my room in ten minutes?", I dismiss the subject and stand up. Without waiting for an answer, I walk to my hotel room and scratch my arm nervously. After everything my uncle has done to me, I'm unsure what to tell Chishiya. The truth or a quickly improvised lie?