We Are A Secret (Camren) [Editing]

44. Not Enough

Lauren's Pov

I haven't had a good conversation with Camila for quite some weeks now. We're too busy with school and extra activities that we barely have time to send a good morning text or a hey in the middle of the day. It's not healthy for our relationship but with our tight schedules, we're going to have to find a way through it.

It's even more difficult now since it's the end of the semester and were busy studying for class finals. We've celebrated our one year and it was pretty amazing. New York in December is really cold and I'm missing Miami's weather to be honest but like I said, I don't have time to fly over there.

"Hey Laur, you're back early" Sam says as I enter our shared dorm

"I'm actually late for class and I forgot my books"

"Oh okay, hurry up then. I'll be here when you're back"

"Okay"

"I talked to Camila earlier by the way!" She yells as I'm half way out the door

"You what?"

"Camila called me earlier, she was bored"

"Why didn't she call me?" I ask slightly pissed

"I don't know, ask her"

I exit the room and speed walk out the grand hall. Why did she call Sammy instead of me? Is she mad at me? I discard all thoughts as I approach my class. The professor was already giving the lecture and I knew it would be so awkward once I walked in.

I waited a few moments and took a step inside. Like I had predicted, it was really awkward and embarrassing. It was dead silent and all eyes were on me. That was the last time I'd be late for class ever.

As I sat down on the only available seat, I caught glimpse of that fuckboy Luis who sent a wink in my direction followed by a smirk. I rolled my eyes at him and took a seat. The class went by fast since it was another easy concept.

"Hey Lauren, Christen and I were wondering if you'd like to hang out?" Julie asked me as soon as we exited the class

"Yeah sounds good, let me just tell Sammy"

We ended up going to the mall. An hour later, our hands were filled with bags from different stores. From what I could tell, Julie loved shopping. For a second though, Camila crossed my mind and the memories of us shopping together. I sighed out loud which didn't come unnoticed by my two friends.

"What's wrong Lauren?"

"Just doing this reminds me of the times I did this with Camila"

"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring you here and make you remember" Julie was quick to apologize

"No it's fine"

"You have a girlfriend?"

Julie and I both turned to Christen, "Yes for a year now"

"Oh, lovely" she smiled "I'm sure she's beautiful"

"Yes she's gorgeous" I smile back

"I'm glad it's working out" Julie says

"Yeah kinda, we haven't talked in awhile" I shrug

"Is distance becoming a problem?"

"Yeah I think that's it. Plus our schedules are pretty tight right now"

"That must suck"

"Very"

___

I don't know how I did but I did. I managed to catch a break and here I was on a plane to Miami. My relationship was sinking and it couldn't let it sink any longer. It's both of our faults for letting it get to this point but now is not the time to be pointing fingers.

It was lunch time when I arrived and I knew Camila was in a class. I messaged Dinah that I was here and we hung out for awhile until Camila was out of her class. When the time did come, I waited outside the building her class was in, which Dj told me.

"Lauren? What are you doing here?" She asked me surprised

"Came to visit" I shrugged

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"We haven't really talked in a while..."

"Right..."

"Yeah anyway you want to go get some lunch?"

"Yeah let me just go put away my stuff"

____

Conversation easily flowed during lunch but I felt the awkwardness between us, I was pretty sure she felt it too. I came to save our relationship but now that I'm here, it feels like I'm a little too late. I know our break up was some moments away. I wouldn't be dating for a while, she's my first love and I already know she will be hard to get over. Maybe I won't ever get over her.

"This isn't going to work is it?" I ask once we were outside

"We knew from the start that this wasn't going to work 100%"

"At least we tried"

"What do you want?" Camila asks

"You. What do you want?"

"You."

"Then why isn't this working anymore?"

I sigh, "Sometimes just wanting each other isn't enough"

She looks up at me, "Maybe one day we can try again?"

"When we're slightly older and our minds less hectic. When the time is right" I nod

I see tears form in her beautiful brown eyes and I lean down for one last kiss, to remember how her lips felt against mine. It was full of emotion and everything else we wanted to say but couldn't get the words out. We both still loved each other but love isn't always the answer to everything. I pull away and grab her hand.

"May we meet again.." I whisper

She nods looking down and slowly I retreat and let go of her hand when I'm no longer in arms length. I head towards my home where I will gather my stuff to go back to New York. This is the last time I'd be stepping in Miami for a very long time.

The End

A/n: I'm sorry it was rushed and really short, I just wanted to end it already because the time was coming. I may right an epilogue of them in the future and a rekindled relationship but that's if you guys want. I enjoyed writing this book, thank you all for being here on this journey. Go ahead and read my latest book "The Lost Luna", if you're into mystical things you'll love it. Once again thank you, love you all ❤️ ~Erica