Love Letters

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"How many times have you had sex?" The old doctor asked in a judging way, raising her old eyebrow at Kate. Anthony sat in the hospital room with her fumbling with his hands. Right after she threw up she demanded him to go to the hospital. She knew she had been a week late on her menstrual period, and the fact she threw up out of no where was scaring her.

"I don't know." Kate replied as the nurse continued asking more questions.

"Have you had protected sex at all times?"

"I think..."The brunette chuckled nervously making the nurse roll her eyes and say, "We'll run some blood tests. The results should could come back tomorrow evening to determine whether your pregnant or not." Kate usually didn't mind getting blood withdrawn. But as soon as the needle entered her skin she flinched thinking about John. Her mind was racing a thousand miles per hour. What if she was pregnant? She was only eighteen, almost nineteen. Her birthday was around the corner and her only present was no relationship, and a possibility of being pregnant. The entire situation made her want to fly far away. As the needle exited her skin, the nurse applied a bandaid to the open flesh dismissing the two out of the hospital room. The walk outside to the car was uncomfortable. Anthony didn't know what to say. Lighting his cigarette he mumbled, "Are you gonna tell Candy? She's your best friend."

"No. This is a secret between you and me. Understand?"

"What? Kate! She's your best friend! You need her! Not me!"

"Congrats Anthony! You are now best friend number two! Now Candy doesn't have to know." She sarcastically said slamming the car door shut. She began to sob and Anthony handed her a lit cigarette. The two sat in the old van smoking there lives away. He was calm, and relaxed while Kate was having a mental breakdown. She rolled down the window and ripped her bandaid off staring down at the needle mark on her forearm. She was hoping someone would find the bandaid and use it to clone her. That way she could have someone replace her, and solve the shitty problems happening in her life. She had lost John just like she lost Bill. Not Johns friend Bill, her ex boyfriend Bill. He had been cheating on her for a couple months. The scandal was very organized and secretive. Just like how John managed to keep his heroin addiction a secret from Kate. Her life was crumbling before her very own eyes. Her job would not be able to support herself financially. The monthly rent for the apartment was more than her paycheck doubled. She was used to having John there for her. But now he wasn't. It was just her. This made her scared. She now had to find who she truly was. She wasn't happy with her job and lifestyle. Looking down at her forearm she took her cigarette and pressed the burning embers against the needle mark crying out in pain. Anthony grabbed her arm and swatted the charred cigarette off her forearm exclaiming, "What the hell, Kate!" She began sobbing as he pulled her into his shoulder. Look at you, she thought to herself as her tears began to stain Anthony's leather jacket. He didn't know what to do. This young girls life was crumbling before his very own eyes and he wasn't sure who to be mad at. Making light of the situation he joked, "So did you really mean it when you said I'm your best friend?" She laughed lightly shoving his shoulder mumbling, "Shut it, Kiedis."

"Are you sure your gonna be okay by yourself?" Anthony asked once again walking Kate to her apartment door. "Yeah. I'm gonna clean and do some stuff." She mumbled scratching the back of her neck. Looking up at Anthony she continued, "Thanks again for um helping me. I appreciate it." She opened her arms and embraced him slowly. He hugged back and soon left. He was in a dilemma. If he didn't tell Candy she would eventually find out and hate him. But if he decided to tell Candy, Kate would hate him. He groaned slamming his head onto the steering wheel listening to the car horn blast throughout the parking lot.

Kate sighed taking all the pictures of her and John off the bedroom wall of the apartment. She placed the polaroids into an old shoe box that was stored under her bed. Hoping to never see it again. Trudging to the fridge she pulled out a bottle of whiskey and flicked the cap off when the doorbell rang. She sighed in annoyance, and violently yanked the door open to see the mailman standing there holding a vase of roses.

"These are for you. A young man came in about a month ago and asked me to give them to you a month later. He never explained why it was very strange. I had to take care of these flowers! And I still didn't get a raise!" The mailman exclaimed as Kate took the vase from his hands and slowly closed the door. Turning on her heel she placed the flowers onto the kitchen table when a letter fell from bouquet of roses. Unfolding the crinkly letter it read,

To Kate,
I'm sorry. For the pain I've caused. I should've told you about my addiction sooner. The reason I'm writing this letter very early in advance, is because I'm afraid my addiction to heroin is getting worse. I want to apologize for anything I might do. I'm probably going to break your heart. And it's my fault because I've lost you. Don't wait for me. I don't know what path I'm heading down. Whether it be good or bad, I will live the rest of my life happy knowing Kate Viverette is living her best life. I payed almost every monthly rent in advance, that should last about two years. You don't have to worry about trying to pay the rent. Go live your life. Don't spend it moping about me. I made my own decision. It was a bad one, but now I have to suffer with the consequences. You still have your life. Please just go out into the world and carry on. I love you so so so much.

Xoxo
Always and forever,
John Frusciante

As she got towards the end of the letter her eyes began to get blurry with tears. They poured from her eyes like a broken faucet. As her tears began to soak the paper she grabbed a tissue blowing her nose. How am I supposed to move on without you, she thought to herself clutching the letter to her chest.

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