I don't wanna lose you (requested)

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Author's Note: republishing because I forgot to put a trigger warning the first time around.

This chapter contains sensitive content. Talks about self harm. If that makes you uncomfortable please don't read it.

If you ever need anything, I'm just a message away. I love you all so much 🤍

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"Y/N?"

You jumped over Chaeryeong's voice coming from the other side of the bathroom door.

"I'm home. Are you in there?"

You felt thankful that you had decided to lock the door despite her not being home yet when you first came in here.

"Yeah. I'll be right out." You said as you stared down at your wrist.

There were a few drops of blood on it and you hoped it would stop soon so Chaeryeong wouldn't notice anything.

You stood up from the floor and put the blade away before going to the sink.

You turned on the faucet and put your wrist beneath it, wincing from the stinging that appeared from the water against your skin.

Once the blood stopped, you dried your wrist and then opened the door.

Chaeryeong was standing there, having been prepared to knock to check on you since a few minutes had gone by.

She smiled as she pulled you into her arms.

"Hi, baby." She said before kissing your lips softly. "How was your day?"

"Pretty good." You lied.

"Yeah? That's good." She replied.

You went to walk away and go over to the bed but Chaeryeong wasn't ready to let you go just yet.

Her grip wasn't tight nor did she have the intention of causing you any pain or discomfort.

But as you stepped away, she grabbed your wrist with a pout.

And she just so happened to grab your wrist right on your newest cut.

You winced from the pain and her heart dropped.

"Did I hurt you, baby?" She asked as she pulled you back into her arms. "I'm so sorry."

"It's fine, don't worry." You nervously said.

She looked at your wrist as you realized you hadn't pulled your sleeve down like you thought you had.

"What happened here?" She quietly asked upon seeing your cut. "Did you get hurt?"

"No, I'm okay. Really, baby." You said as you tried to calm her worries and brush it all off, hoping she'd let it go.

But it didn't take long for her to notice the scars from other cuts on your wrist and it clicked soon after.

She looked down, unable to look into your eyes.

"Chaeryeong?"

She sniffled as she lifted her head and when her eyes met yours, you noticed that she was crying.

"You did this to yourself, didn't you, baby?"

You nodded.

"Oh." She quietly said. "My poor girl. You've been hurting and I didn't even know it."

A tear fell down her cheek and you brought your other hand to her cheek to wipe it away.

"I'm sorry." You said.

"No, don't be sorry, baby. You have nothing to apologize for." She said as she threw her arms around you. "It just hurts me to know that you've been hurting. You can talk to me and open up to me."

"I know. I'm sorry I didn't. I've just been so overwhelmed and I didn't know how to talk about it."

"I understand." She whispered before a couple of sobs left her lips. "Oh, god, baby. I don't wanna lose you."

Her cries broke your heart.

She loves and cares about you so much and all she ever wants to do is treat you like a princess and make you happy.

But you've clearly been hurting and that's a hard pill for her to swallow.

"I love you so much." You whispered.

"I love you even more and I promise, I'll help you through this. Whatever it takes. You can talk to me about what made this all start. I'll hold you tight, tell you how incredible you are, and I'll do everything I can to make it better."

Your eyes filled with tears as she spoke.

She was determined to make it okay and help you through this and that wasn't surprising, because you know how much she cares.

"Even if I'm thousands of miles away, whether it's morning or night, if I'm in the middle of an interview or activities with the girls - you can always reach out and I'll be there, no matter what."

You looked up at her.

"Just promise me that I won't lose you. I can't." She pleaded.

"I promise." You said as you kissed her cheek softly.

She held onto you again, hugging you tighter than ever before, and you relaxed into her embrace, wondering what you would ever do without her.

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