Everything Will Be Just Fine (Completed)

10. Sit Down

Two days later...

I bite my thumbnail anxiously, examining the reception office. There's an old woman and her grandchild, I suppose. They both look happy and serene, unlike me. I told Billy I was hanging out with Kate when actually I am with Sue at the hospital. 

Jacob didn't say anything : he was out all day with that girl, Bella, I think. Her father and Billy are close friends. 

I snap back into reality when Dr. Cullen himself greets us. Sue looks at him harshly, her lips pulled in a tight line, saying nothing. 

"Alexandra, please follow me." he says before leaving. I walk in his steps and close his office's door.

"Sit down, be at your ease." he tells me, motioning the chair with his hand. I sit and wait patiently for him to tell me the results.

He takes a sharp breath and starts, his eyes piercing mine. "I have some bad news Ms. Cooper. Your test results came back in and I analyzed them. I immediately noticed an abnormally huge quantity of red cells in your blood sample. I pushed the analysis and I saw an intruder."

I don't say a thing and wait for him to drop the conclusion. He has such a tormented face, I wonder if I should really worry.

"You have cancer."

I stare at him and say nothing, not believing what he just said. I see his lips moving, but I don't hear anything : all I hear is a buzzing sound coming from my ears, obscuring anything else. I don't want to accept reality, I don't want to have cancer.

"Alexandra ?" his muffled voice makes its way through the silence and I snap alive. "I'll send you the possible treatment and expect from you to answer by next week. I also want to see your legal guardian." he explains, handing me a paper with a lot of words on it. 

I nod and thank him before leaving the room, my hand firmly gripping the ordinance. I keep my eyes on the floor and I don't look up.

Until I bump into someone. 

"Sorry, I'm so sorry... Let me help you up." the person offers while getting me up from the floor. Normally, I would've smiled at the person and left. 

I fear that if I stay anymore here, I might burst into tears right away. I am about to leave in a hurry without acknowledging the person but he decides it might be a good idea to present more excuses.

"I'm again so sorry, I wasn't looking." he fusses. I look at his face and freeze. Oh hell no. Not him.

He notices my stillness and stares back at me, finally understanding who I am. 

"Um... it's you." he says, letting me go, his hands in his jeans' pockets. 

"Yep." I say back like a total idiot. I don't know why, but everytime I'm around him, I have to be nervous and anxious. 

"Well... See you around." he tells me before walking away. I stare at him as he walks away, feeling my heart break, strangely. Everyone seems to be leaving me these days.

*****

"Sweetie, I don't know what happened with the doctor, but just looking at your face tells me it's important. You must tell Billy !" Sue tries to convince me, though she doesn't have to. 

I have to tell my uncle, he's my legal guardian and if I want to get rid of the cancer, he has to sign all those forms. Gosh, he will be the one to pay the medical bills ! I hate putting pressure on him or anyone, actually.

I say goodbye to Sue and I enter the house. I hear William and Jacob in the kitchen, preparing the dinner, I suppose. I follow the shoutings to see them having a flour attack. I laugh a little : Jake's hair is going to be hard to wash and Will's clothes are completely ruined. They notice me and stop immediately, maybe fearing that I might be mad at them for doing a mess.

"Hey ! Um... Where were you this afternoon ?" Jacob asks me, probably trying to disturb me.

"At the hospital." I mutter while walking to William. "Go get a shower, Will. And put on some pajamas while you're at it." I tell him. He doesn't question me, he can feel I don't want to discuss.

"What do you mean 'at the hospital' ?" he demands.

I ignore him. "Where's Uncle Billy ?" I ask him, turning on my feet to look if I can see him. As if it was premeditated, he comes scrolling in in his wheelchair.

"Dad ! Alex was all afternoon at the hospital and she doesn't want to tell me anything !" Jacob says, his hands up in the air to mark his frustration.

Billy looks at me questioningly. "What does this mean Alexandra ?" 

I take out my ordinance and hand it to him. I see him reading the first line, and his eyes widen. He stares at me in shock and drops the paper, which makes Jacob reach for it and read it. They are both staring at me, waiting for me to talk. 

I shake my head before running out of the kitchen. I can't face their questions, their reassurement and fake smiles. I just dropped a bomb and I know it. I lock myself in my room.

I quickly change into comfy pajamas : one of Dad's old T-shirt with a legging. I then lay on my bed and close my eyes. 

I don't know how much time it took me, but the tears soon start falling. Hot, big tears roll down my cheeks and drip on my skin, T-shirt and bed. I whimper, hug my pillow and sob softly. I make sure not to make too much noise. I don't need their pity. I've had enough before. I don't need anyone to see me like this. 

I decide to get up and go stand next to the window. The sky is dark, with brilliant and shining stars. It's beautiful. I lose myself in the landscape, before my thoughts creep back in my brain. I've heard enough story and seen enough movies about cancer to know what'll come next : I'll have to go through chemo, lose hair, weight and not sleep well, throw up. But it can save me. It can make me healthy again and I won't have to leave William. Like others did.

So... here it is. The big reveal ! (hahaha... I'm so embarrassing)

No, but more seriously, I hope you can understand that I have absolutely no idea how a cancer is formed and all... 

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