Small Doses

Chapter 16: Mew

We are at the sofa. Gulf is checking the channels on the television looking restless while I am back at my laptop checking some emails. Then I see an email from Olive.

Ring.Ring.

"Hi Sir Mew. How's your vacation?" Olive is hyped again.

"It isn't a vacation. What's this email you sent?"

"You mean the proposal for the pineapple plantation?"

"Do you have any other email then?"

"What's wrong with the proposal Sir?"

"Redo it."

"But Sir I followed your instructions."

"I know but I expect you to be creative when you present it. Do it again."

"Sir I think this is best done by a project manager."

"If I don't believe that you can do it, I wouldn't have it assigned to you. Do it." Then I ended the call.

I started typing on the laptop when I noticed Gulf staring at me. I turned to him, "Olive can do better."

"I know Mew, but can't you just be a little gentle with her. "

I sighed, "I'll try." Then I went back to my laptop typing some important notes.

Gulf though is not yet done talking. "So ummm, what's in this town?"

Now, this is a conversation I am comfortable with. "Bananas. The town manufactures banana fibers."

"It's banana this time. Why this type of fibers anyway?" He asked curious.

"It's not the type of fibers Gulf. It's the people. I want to help the people who has less chances to be seen. I want to help those with no access to technology. I can help bring their craft into a wider market." I said.

"Why didn't you say that to the people when we were at the pineapple plantation?"

"Because I'm not used to explaining myself to anyone."

"Well you're explaining it to me just fine." He said.

I looked at him intently. Why are you always so clueless Gulf? "Because I like you."

Well that shut him up.

"Mew, about that."

I looked at him square in the eye, "Are you going to tell me that you're a straight guy again?" I looked down on my computer. "If you say that again, you just might as well tattoo that on your forehead so you can spare yourself from repeating it."

From my periphery, I see him stand up, then he walked back and forth in front of me. I looked up. He stopped walking and turned to me, "I'd like to get to know you better."

Am I hallucinating? I closed my laptop and put it in the table in front of me.

He fetched something from his pocket, sat down beside me, reached for my hand and put something there. I looked at it. The necklace.

"I am not saying I am not straight Mew and right now that word is making a loop in my head confusing me. But it always ends with me wanting to get to know you more. So let's get to know each other. Figure out what this is."

Speechless. I am so speechless all I can hear is my heart beating faster. I looked at the necklace. "Are you sure about this?"

He sighed. "No I'm honestly not Mew and I can't promise it's gonna end the way you want us to end but I at least want to explore this."

He's saying something I should have said years ago. "Okay Gulf."

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Awkward is an understatement of how we are acting after that talk, and somebody has to break it.

It's almost sunset. We are moving in the house awkwardly. He will politely say something to me and I politely reply. I would ask him questions and he would answer without looking at me in the eye. We look like idiots.

"Gulf, do you want to go out?"

"Where to?"

"I was told there is a good place uphill to look at the sunset. Probably a 15 minute walk, just in time for the sun to set, if you're up to it."

"Let's go." He moved so fast. I almost laughed. It seems to me that I am not the only one who feels uncomfortable.

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"Are you sure you know where we're going Mew?"

It sounded easy enough when the locals pointed the cliff and said just follow the trail, "Let's just follow the trail Gulf."

"This doesn't look like an easy trail Mew." He said out of breath. I turned to him. He is trying to go up a steep rock and shying away from twigs getting on his way. He looked up to me, "What now?"

I smiled, "Careful." He has his camera hanging on his neck, "Do you want me to carry your camera?"

"Are you kidding me? Just continue okay?" He said trying to catch up on me.

I moved up on my way. After another five minutes, I see the sky. "We're almost there Gulf, hang on."

"As if there is anything else I can do." He is blabbering. "You might want to sing Mew, just to lighten my darkening mood."

"There are days
I wake up and I pinch myself
You're with me, not someone else
And I am scared, yeah, I'm still scared
That it's all a dream'Cause you still look perfect as days go by
Even the worst ones, you make me smile
I'd stop the world if it gave us time'Cause when you love someone
You open up your heart
When you love someone
You make room
If you love someone
And you're not afraid to lose 'em
You'll probably never loved someone like I do
You'll probably never loved someone like I do"

I looked back to check on Gulf, "You became quiet."

He smiled, "You actually sang."

I continued walking, "You told me to."

"Will you always do what I tell you to?"

"Just the reasonable ones." I said wondering what qualifies as reasonable.

"I see the sun Gulf." Not even a minute more, we've reached the cliff.

Gulf started to take pictures of the sunset and me. I put my hands in my pockets and posed.

After taking a shot, Gulf lowered his camera, "How come I don't see you smile often Mew?"

"I didn't have a reason then." It's either the sun or he is really blushing.

We sat on a rock and watched the sun set quietly.

"Tell me a story Mew." He said breaking the silence.

I looked at him. He is looking at the horizon. Gulf looks perfect, even on this side, he looks beautiful. I am not a poet I can only sing. I don't have a way with words, what story can I tell?

Gulf looked at me. We looked at each other just memorizing each others features. "I don't have a story to tell Gulf."

Gulf smiled and looked at me with hope in his eyes, "Sooner or later you'll tell me your story Mew. Your story behind your smile or the lack of it and even the songs you sing. I want to know you, then and now."

"Does it really matter?" I reached for his hand. "Because the way I see it. Here, now, with you is the only thing that matters."

"I hope you're right and it's really that easy." Then he clasped my hand tighter in his.